With all the dramas in my family, I can’t begin to tell you how hard it’s been to write or think about anything else. I’m sure though you have all been through it yourselves at some point. I didn’t even realise how much it must have affected myself until yesterday when I saw that I had taken several days to get back to comments.
That’s the annoying thing any mental health condition, anxiety, depression, etc. You don’t always realise until later what happened. I do think I’ve been depressed the last few days. Not because though, I am sad about what’s happened. I think its because for a long time, this what I thought was going to happen. I always thought it might happen when I have kids, and that life conflicts with what my mum, the Maskalls and brother think are “right”.
I think what annoys me the most, is the hypocrisy. My mum complains about the Maskalls the most, my brother did everything he could so they wouldn’t meet his last partner. Yet, of course they don’t do anything wrong too me. Why do I have to keep dealing with them, and be degraded and humiliated and they don’t treat anyone else like that.
This is the first birthday that I’ve looked forward too, for about 5 years now, because I don’t have to cater too them. The last two I have literally had to have my birthday on nights that suited them, and one…I wasn’t even invited too originally. That was probably the most embarrassed that I have ever been. I was only allowed to invite about 5 friends to “my” birthday, and that was last minute. My partner didn’t come because he was angry with them.
So, to say my writing has taken a bit of a dip lately, is a bit of an understatement.
Do you have a way to get out of a writing block funk?
- I forgive myself first of all. I always sit down and tell myself that it is okay to stop.
- This might sound “odd” but I try to eat better as well. That’s mainly because even I don’t feel any changes, mentally. I know I’ve done something well for my body.
- These days I’ve started to do gardening. Unfortunately, we’re heading towards Winter again. Still in Autumn, but it is getting darker earlier already. So gardening isn’t always an option.
- I also do a little cleaning, there’s always something to clean!
20 Songs to Pump You Up for Cleaning Your Home – July 22, 2020 12:47 pm ; The Maids . com