A warning to all bloggers

If you ever tag me or one of my posts where I’ve asked for help. Too spread misinformation about something you have clearly not talked to myself or someone actually affected by that problem. I WILL come down on you like a tonne of bricks.

We live in a world, where there is NO excuse for bigotry, there is NO excuse not to ask. There are no excuses for misinformation. You’re free to have an opinion about whatever I say and post, but don’t EVER tag me in a post where I’m asking for help. You then use that post to write total and utter bullshit, about that cause.

If you don’t know about something, don’t write or talk like you do.

This is 2020, don’t be part of the hateful bullshit.

I can’t believe I have to explain this to “adults”…

The difference between voting, drinking, smoking, driving a car and getting puberty blockers, or transitioning. One has Doctors, Nurses, therapists and (generally) supportive parents the whole way. The others do not. Guess which one is which!

One takes literally years with Doctors, Nurses, therapist’s and (generally) supportive parents, to even be able to get and actually use them. Voting, Drinking, Smoking and learning to drive a car, does not. Voting, Drinking, Smoking and learning to drive a car, are also not medical treatments. They are also things that not every one can handle. Yes, some adults can’t handle voting, drinking, smoking and learning to drive a car, or even handling a car.

Being transgender is not the same as being a “tom boy” or a “feminine” boy. Even if for some ludicrous reason, your parents sent you to a clinic, because you being a tom boy to them, means you’re trans. It does not MEAN that the Doctors, Nurses and Therapist’s are just going to automatically make you transition or put you on puberty blockers. That’s the DUMBEST thing I keep hearing.

There are so many DUMB things about the whole thing really.

Again, for those who are a little hard of learning.

• Getting puberty blocks or transitioning are MEDICAL…Hence, why they have Doctors, Nurses and Therapists.
• Voting, Drinking, Smoking, learning to drive a car are NOT medical.
• Also not all adults can handle voting, drinking, smoking and handling a car. Hence, why a lot of old people and adults have their licenses taken away.
• Amazing how many Gender Critical’s call puberty blockers, 50+ year medical treatment “experimental”. But the COVID vaccine, a vaccine not even a year old. Oh, they’re ALL for that.
• TERFs are being shut down in the US…THE US…You know Trump Country, yet, in the UK, they are being amplified with misinformation and lies.
• TERFS and GCs are being shut down in every first world, progressive country EXCEPT the UK. Where, like Russia, they are embracing and promoting harm towards the trans community
• Doctors, Nurses and Therapists, are NOT giving out puberty blockers like candy, as some will suggest.
• It takes YEARS to get onto blockers and to transition.
• Even with Bell, if she was to come to get puberty blockers at the same age she did originally, she would be able to get them. She first got puberty blockers at 16. It wasn’t until her 20’s, after surgery that she regretted.
• Keira Ball has only talked, since, to all anti-trans, homophobic people and organisations.
• WHEN AMNESTY AND LIBERTY FOR ALL HAVE TO STEP IN, BECAUSE A RULING IS HORREOUNDOUS. YOU’RE PROBABLY ON THE WRONG SIDE.
• When the ONLY people to celebrate your “win”, are anti-trans, homophobic and Trump Supporters. Common sense would dictate again, YOU’RE PROBABLY ON THE WRONG SIDE.

And, again don’t EVER...EVER tag me when I’m asking for help, in a bigoted post. Especially if you’re an “adult” complaining how kids/teenagers don’t get or understand anything about their own bodies and minds.

So ridiculous. Donald must work on his Anger Management problem, then go to a good old fashioned movie with a friend! Chill Donald, Chill! https://t.co/4RNVBqRYBA

— Greta Thunberg (@GretaThunberg) November 5, 2020

July 4th

I’m writing this now, because I feel like it’s important to get this out there while there is still time…Just a little friendly reminder before the big festivities.

Whether you are planning to go out or not for July 4th celebrations. Remember to make sure your pets, whether they be furry, scaly or feathery, are protected against the fireworks. Especially if you are going out. Before you leave, make sure animals are inside the house. Make sure that gates are secure. You’d be surprised with how strong any kind of animal can get when they are scared.

Prepare Early.

The problem I find are is that a lot of people letting off fireworks. Let them off a lot earlier than is allowed, and a lot later than allowed. Not too many people keep fireworks going off at the designated times. Other than where there are community festivals. I’ve found that every year, the biggest complaints I have seen. Are because people are letting fireworks off when they shouldn’t be letting them. Either it can be the day before or continue till the day after. So it’s best to be prepared early. Too not assume that people think of others.

Some tips:

• Try to keep everything normal
• Keep all animals indoors, even cats.
• If you can move horses somewhere safer, do.
• Be aware that a frightened animal, can be likely to bolt and cause harm to themselves. Be aware of sharp objects.
• Make sure that animals are micro-chipped and have a tag or collar on them. Make sure contact details are up to date.
• If possible make sure someone else can take care of your pets, if you plan to head out.

Last year some people actually got together and instead of going out. They decided to go to the animal shelters and help to take care of dogs. In cramped small cages, they called themselves the Calming Companions. 

“Normal” – Trigger Warning

I’ve been wondering how to write this without feeling like I’m ignoring people’s problems. Oh! I will be talking about the recent suicides that have been occurring in the world of Hollywood…

I personally haven’t been reading too much into. I try to skip pass the articles if I can. At the moment, although I am not suicidal. Ever since I’ve had my anxiety attack, I’ve been finding that I am more…I guess,paranoid, about my health. If I hear something, I am convinced that I’ve got it.

The frustrating thing I am actually starting to feel “normal” again…Changed, but normal and feeling more like myself only very recently.  The funny thing was I only started to realise it a couple of days ago. I was just doing your average things and I realise how I hadn’t felt for a little while, it’s kind of starting to be forgotten about. Although I doubt it’ll truly be ever “forgotten”.

I just don’t like hearing about other people’s suicide. I’m here to help stop that, but I’m still having trouble with hearing about it, especially when it is just EVERYWHERE! It’s like every second article or statement is about one of them.

Taking a step backward…Step FORWARD!

Maybe not the best way to set up a Monday, but I felt like it was a point that I wanted to talk about, of something that happened to me over the weekend. I felt like I had taken a huge step back.

*Just warning…If you do suffer from a anxiety and you’re having a bad day, this post may not be for you today. Even though there is a positive message behind it. I don’t want to be responsible for any triggering.*

Friday morning i had the day off of work and with how well I had been on Thursday, I had decided to head out and do some shopping on the Friday morning. Lately I have been ordering pretty much everything online, because I don’t know how I am going to be from one day to the other.

Taking you back to last year, after an traumatic incident, I have developed an, well I think, a really odd form of anxiety. Too break it down, because someone, who will remain nameless at this point, decided that no, they could not pull over (even though we went past a McDonald’s, a gas station AND a public toilet) and let me out to get to a toilet. I spent 20 minutes basically trapped in a car, actually NEEDING to get out. After the person had left me hanging all day while I drunk tea all day and no food. We were supposed to go clothes shopping, but they had to do some things in the morning. Which was fine, but once it got to 3pm, I was starting to get annoyed. I didn’t know if we were eating, was I supposed to eat first. I was actually in the middle of a text to let them not to bother, when they finally showed up. Our clothes stores close at 5pm on the weekend.

So giving that they finally turned up, we basically run out of the door, which was a bad idea. I didn’t go to the toilet before we left and I had been drinking all day, to fill my stomach. I had been filling my bladder instead.Since then whenever I am in a car, or travelling. I get anxious and feel like I need to get to a toilet badly. I have been getting better with help of hypnotherapy.

I was actually getting better, until a couple of weeks ago. I had one bad night, where I don’t even know what happened, but my stomach hurt and I just had to go. Then it feels like it’s gotten worse, with a rare good day here and there, and just this Friday morning I nearly ended up crying in a shopping mall. It was horrible and I hate it.

I felt SO fed up, I’m tired of fighting it because it’s feels so stupid. When I do go, even in the woes of panic, nothing happens…I can’t even begin to tell you how frustrating it is, how tiring it is. I can’t just do things on a whim and even when I plan things, it still doesn’t always work out. I’m alright coming back and forth from work and sometimes travelling to my partners house I do really well.

Then I have mornings like I did Friday…

I try not to be too hard on myself, I’m doing well every well else, just more necessarily when I have a “duty”.

 That’s the whole thing though, I am so tired of it, that I now have a plan. I had stopped doing all the things that had helped when I started to get better, because I swear just that one bad moment has seemingly ruined it all.

1. So instead of doing it once a week, like I was before. I’m not going to be mediating and listening to my hypnosis tapes, at LEAST every second day. Definitely the night before long trips.
2. I have to promise to myself to not be so hard on myself.
3. When I go shopping by myself, if I need to leave, then I need to leave…It’s alright
4. I have to start walking my dog again, because that was what honestly what started to heal me before. Whether that be a 5 minute walk or a 30 minute walk, I handle what I can handle. That’s what I used to do before. The walks got longer and longer over time.
5. No coffee before long drives.
6. Mostly, it’s okay to admit I am not okay, but I will be. I am not going to let this defeat me.
7. Trying to figure out a way to calm my mind down before I get into a car, especially with those unexpected trips.

I would actually really like any ideas, or any suggestions about any of the above, or if you want to share…Please feel free…No judgement!

This or That? #53

This or That? #54

This week Bookmark Chronicles would like to know:

Do you think that some books should have trigger warnings?

I have to say that I 100% feel like that some books should come with a trigger warning, even the books that you know have your trigger issues in them, should still come with a warning. Even with some fiction books I’ve read, people have based them on real events or real issues. Take one of Jodi Picoults books. I love her and love her books, but a lot of her books are done with a lot of research and speaking with people who are experts in the field and people who have really experienced these issues. “My Sisters Keeper” for example, both the movie and the books. I’m sure people have gone through these types of scenarios before.

If you haven’t experienced a Jodi Picoult book before, and not realised how much effort and time she takes into these issues. It could be possibly be a very big shock to them to see so much detail and accuracy. Especially if you get someone who recommends the book as you are also going through the same issues, who may not realise how much of a trigger it’ll be.

Online dating tips

It amazes and saddens me to constantly read in the news and on the television another life wasted after meeting up with someone through a “dating” site. It’s a serious issue as more and more people take the the web to find their future “somebodies”.

Unfortunately not everyone is on these dating sites to find a future somebody. Speaking from some  of the experiences I’ve been told a lot of stories of people who use genuine dating site as a hook up, instead of the sites created to be a hook up site.

So a couple of tips from someone who has actually found her possible future someone online and has also had some interesting stories that she could share with you!

1. Do not go to anybodies house, meet out in a public place and in mutual territory…Especially on the first date!
2. Meet up somewhere where you can get out of a uncomfortable situation, quickly.
3. On the first few dates let someone you know well and trust, where and when you are going on this date.
4. Make sure you have a way to get home. Do not let them take you home, no matter how earnestly they offer.
5. If someone automatically wants to meet up at their house on the second date, chances are they are only in it for one reason. Be honest, let them know it makes you feel uncomfortable and if they don’t offer another public place, or just quit speaking with you. They were clearly in it for one reason.
6. If you feel uncomfortable in any situation, whether you are on a date or just chatting online with them, listen to your gut and stop the situation.
7. As I mentioned before don’t be surprised if someone is using a genuine dating site, rather than a hookup site, to, infact, hook up.

Can you think of any other tips you would give to someone using an online dating site for the first time? Especially advice and hints to keep themselves safe?

It’s like Radar!

Three Guesses what this Blog post is about!

I got the text…The text that you don’t see coming…You’ve moved on so far it doesn’t enter your brain that when you feel your phone vibrate there is no warning sound…No loud alarm…No warning before you swipe to say “DO NOT OPEN UP THIS PHONE UNTIL YOU ARE READY!”

So I am going to make him suffer…”All this I am so sorry stuff” So he should be! He can wait until tomorrow!

The 19 realest things Lauren Conrad said on “The Hills” that are still relevant today!