Share Your World – 02/11/2020

Share Your World – 11/02/2020

Questions:

Which meal is your favorite: breakfast, lunch, or dinner?

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I love ALL my meals. There are some days where I look more forward to one more than the other. Like Christmas morning, even though we have a huge lunch. We have a really yummy breakfast, it changes from year to year. But we always have a nice breakfast, before we head off to my Aunts for the big lunch. No wonder, I always fall asleep, lol.

Who do you admire most in the world?

I probably admire my Great Grandfather the most. He passed when I was about 2/3 years old. Too this day though, he still influences me. Every now and then I find something that he was interested in, that I too am interested in. He loved taking his daughter (my Gran) to plays, loved Shakespeare and he loved the Ancient Greeks. Before he passed, he was trying to learn Greek, to travel and see the sites. We found a book full of scribblings of his. That was only in my 20’s that we found that.

With the obvious restrictions in place, what do you regret not doing in the last year?

Learning how to draw earlier. I’m starting to get that feeling that I’ve wasted a lot of the year. It’s been hard to motivate myself. I’ll have days where I’ll start something, but then, there’s always that excuse to stop.


GRATITUDE SECTION:  (Optional)

Feel free to share something you’re grateful for.  

sunflower

You…My sane blogging community!

Who are you?

Talking with the girls (as one does) and we were talking about which ex’s do we regret the most. I’m not sure that I actually regret any of my past relationships, however there is one relationship that has an interesting way to view it and I wonder if I am alone in this.

My last relationship I felt like he was lying so much about who he was, that he never knew who I was. To me there is not way that he could possibly have cared about the real me, because if you don’t know who a person is…How can you possibly know what can hurt them? How would you know what they would consider to be a betrayal?

I put it down to this, it was like dating an actor, but dating their amazing fictional character and then realising, disappointingly,  you were dating this whole other real reality. It’s the best way that I can think of to explain my last relationship. I think that’s why I find it so hard to get over what happened…Who did I date? Did I date the man, or the character?Any ways…Don’t matter no more ~.^ hehe

Facebook? The new mortifying diary?

Last night my Mum and I were talking about how we both have had diaries from our younger years and how mortified we were by what we had written in there. My mother was so ashamed by one of her diaries that she actually burnt it.

Which then brought us to talk about all these people who post these posts on Facebook. In ten years time will they look back at those posts like we “older” people look back at our diaries and cringe, except there is a huge glaring difference…Facebook is public.For example, there is this girl who is ALWAYS talking about how she’s better than her boyfriends ex and calling her all sorts of names. In a recent post she’s talking about she got into a fight with her boyfriends ex and writes about how this girl needs to stop being weak and get up and fight?

How is she proud enough of this? Then her next status is about how everyone should stay out of her business, because of course we don’t know what she’s dealing with. If she wants people to stay out of her business, why write a PUBLIC post? It’s also amazing how many times her and her boyfriend also just always seem to bump into their exs. That is just one of the many MANY example I can think of posts that make myself cringe.I know most of these people wont understand for years (if ever) how others must be viewing this.

A lot of these problems are also down to their friends though. A lot of this girls friends are calling this girl boyfriends ex a “whore” because she’s contacting this girls boyfriends and saying she misses him. My first question was “Why does she feel comfortable enough to text him that?”. If he REALLY didn’t want her contacting him, he can definitely take steps to stop this from happening. They don’t have a kid together or anything. Stupid girls, this guy must be in HEAVEN!lol

Wobble…Like Jelly…

So tonight I had a bit of a freak out and a bit of a wobble. Currently here in South Australia we are experiencing a major devastating bush fire, people lives are being lost, homes and property completely gone and we unfortunately had one well known kennel and cattery burnt down with many of the dogs and all of the cats still on the property.

Anyways this same night I had a date with the number one guy (there is no number two guy anymore). I heard that the suburbs that three different ex’s of mine are from, were required to evacuate. I couldn’t help myself, I got worried and I realised that I still cared. Not in love care, but worry something will go wrong kind of caring. Then I got angry at myself for caring at all. My mum told me it was perfectly naturally to still care and worry while not being in love with that person.

I hate though that I still care about these people who obviously never cared about me. I highly doubt that if they heard that I had to be evacuated that they would worry about me at all. I got so upset that I still care and I know that they don’t and now I’m frightened that it’ll happen to me all over again.

I can already tell it’s happening, everything that the number one guy did tonight bugged the crap out of me and yet I know in the back of my head none of it’s any of his fault, so I managed to fake a “sickie” and get myself out of the date earlier than anticipated and then collapsed in tears when I got home. 30 years of being treated like hell and I think that I broke tonight. I can feel myself cutting off and becoming cold.

p.s. I will be fine, I just can’t seem to stop crying tonight.

 brokengirl

This Matthew West guy seems to get it…

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