Please, stay single

There are these people that I know who clearly fooling around with each other behind their partners back. I have lost respect for these people over time and I just have very little to do with them anymore. The whole group is just a mess.

It doesn’t just bug me because they are cheating with each other, but it’s also because one of them was single when they met the other originally. They had just gotten out of an engagement and at the time the other person was married. Yet, even though there were obvious feelings between the two: Person A didn’t even leave their marriage until their partner got an amazing job ‘overseas’ and they just didn’t want to put the effort in. Which is when I really started to lose respect since their partner had given up so much to begin with. It was SUCH a cop out.

Person B then started dating nearly all of Person’s A closest friend while, at least, emotionally cheating on them all with Person A and got engaged to one of them. Then conveniently Person A marriage split up and Person B with their fiance…Coincidence.

STOP USING PEOPLE! NO ONE DESERVES THAT!

usins

I have a hard time not saying anything because I’m one of those people who hates injustice of any type. Which means the best that I feel like I can do is just stay away since no one else in the group seem to honestly care and they even called Perfect B “Perfect” and that they could never think of an insult good enough. So it continues.

What the actual…

What this all comes down for me is to tell people. Please, for the love of god, don’t date someone because you can’t be with the person you want too be with. Please don’t date someone because you’re lonely and you don’t think you can’t do any better…You partner doesn’t deserve that. When you start to date someone, please make sure this is what you really want. You may not be sure that you even want to date, but make sure you don’t drag someone else through it. This world is so small, they are plenty of people out there for you.

Dating someone else because you are alone or because you want to be with someone else is not a strong thing and it’s not what a strong person does….Or a good person and definitely not what “perfect” people do either. You know why? A strong and a good person knows that they are okay by themselves. They know that they are okay being alone and that they believe they will find someone, they don’t need to use anyone else. They also know the love they are getting from their family and friends is enough, or the love they have for themselves IS enough. (If it isn’t, maybe look into that…That’s a post for another day though!).

On some level I actually get it, for some people it is very hard to think of others and other people, and seeing from their point of view. Unless they are actually treated this way themselves. They they just don’t care enough to get it. Too me, personally, it also speaks on a level of having no heart and being some kind of a sociopath as well. There’s no heart or kindness to use another human being in such a way. I think there is something off about people who do that, especially people who repeatedly do it.

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!lol…Love yourself and each other ❤

52 Week Grateful Challenge

2.Spouse/Significant Other?

I can’t even begin to tell you how grateful I am for my partner. He is probably one of the best things that has ever happened to me. He is just so kind and it is amazing how much of a difference that has made to my life. All of my other partners, may not have been unnecessarily unkind, and the one that kind of was, was probably more weak than unkind. No back bone can make people do incredibly cruel things, which they should still be held unaccountable for. They were just so inconsiderate and it was always about them.

It’s all the little things that he does, that just stays with me all of the time. Not making me feel bad with my anxiety, he’s been accommodating and when I don’t feel like I can do something, he never makes me feel bad about it. Because of this I feel I can trust him so much more than my other partners and he still does do things by himself. He’s not holding back on things he wants to do, just because I can’t. If it’s a movie he really wants to see, I have no problem with him seeing it by himself.

I honestly feel like this is the most mentally healthy relationship I have ever been in. The trust thing doesn’t just help me to feel like his not cheating on me (all my other partners did at some point). It also helps me trust that if I need to leave, or I suddenly realise I can’t do or go somewhere, he won’t make me feel bad for going back home. Or make me feel like that no matter how bad I’m feeling, we still have to go to the movie, dinner etc. This has helped with my anxiety and it makes me want to follow through a lot more. I am less anxious when I’m with him.

99 Problems…but you wont be one of them…

Sitting here with a great cup of coffee, getting ready for what should I post about next? Then realising I have not written about being single, I figure that I should =P For me any-ways, at the moment everything has been drama free and I have been loving the quiet and peace that comes along with not really having to answer to someone.

One interesting thing that I have found when you are single is how people will react to you about relationship matters. A lot of my friends wont even tell me that they’ve met someone else for fear or “upsetting” me. Some of my friends constantly complain about their relationships, making me feel really grateful that I don’t have to worry about any of that. Especially when most of them people complaining, don’t actually want to talk about their problems with their actual partner.

I never judge a relationship either by Facebook, its amazing what people will tell you when they’re drunk. So one of the best pieces of advice I can give about being single (or if you are having trouble watching an ex move on, on Facebook) … Chill … No one EVER posts about what a miserable time that they are having when it comes to their relationship on Facebook. Also staying away from Facebook all together and NOT stalking your ex’s Facebook is a good piece of advice, block them…Block them right now!

Even with the beginning of a new relationship, that can be full of such doubt for my friends. One of my girlfriends, the guy is clearly a player. Kissed her and then let her know he was seeing someone, so she thinks it can’t be that serious…but still I told her to stay away.

Nope…I am really enjoying being single, no problems and all drama free.

 

Published on 1 May 2014

Ariana Grande feat. Iggy Azalea “Problem” is available to download now
http://smarturl.it/ArianaMyEvrythnDlx…

Music video by Ariana Grande performing Problem. (C) 2014 Republic Records, a division of UMG Recordings, Inc.