LONG POST INCOMING! Once I started I couldn’t stop!lol
I also feel like I need a disclaimer here: *I like guys, I really do, some of my favourite people in the whole wide world are guys. Sometimes I prefer them over other girls. They can be just so much more fun than women. With both genders though, there are people within BOTH genders who make it very difficult for the rest of us. This post is NOT a “guys are jerks” post. As a straight girl though, this is what I have come up against…a lot. This is from my perspective.
I had an incident a few years ago that every now and then comes up for me and it still irritates me SO much. For two main reasons:
- I was tagged in a quote I have never actually even said. I own who I date and I don’t think all guys are jerks because I’ve dated a couple of jerks. Some of ex’s are even nice people as well, and they are good people. We broke up because they love wasn’t there anymore, or it was just never there. A lot of my ex’s are very charismatic and since I’m a shy person, I found them hypnotic almost. You know that saying about opposites attract? Either way I have never said it.
- If you’re going to tag me in something publicly on Facebook, you could at least have the courtesy to have…I don’t know…An adult conversation with me about why I had a one night stand, not that it’s even actually your business. Especially after I’ve turned you down 3 times. I really don’t appreciate having strange guys attacking me. While, ironically, in the quote, you call yourself a “Good Guy”. For future reference a good guy would NEVER get his friends to bully you into dating him.
Also though, to tag me in a post saying that calls all the other guys I have dated are jerks, is not just an insult for me, but some of my ex’s as well. I am actually good friends with a couple of my ex’s. You are attacking good people, who are good friends of mine. So be careful.
Personally, I don’t know what exactly they were trying to achieve and I clearly made the RIGHT decision, by making a personal vow to myself to never date anyone from this group, even before this happened …
Clearly the best decision I have ever made for myself!
Every time this situation comes up for me though, or when I think about it. I get so annoyed about it because I’ve had, one too many times, been attacked by a “good guy” when they’ve actually been complete douchebags. It’s something I want to know, what makes these guys think they’re goods guys WHILE attacking girls/women, sometimes they don’t even know? If girls are not dating you for the “jocks” ever thought, it might just actually be you? Just like the girls who go after the “bad ones” … Especially when I see SO many guys fawning over “mean girls” and girls that are constantly cheating on them, or using them. I have lost guys as friends AFTER they have broken up with their ex’s, who constantly cheated on them, because they are allowing the girl to still use them…I didn’t want to see them get used anymore, and not find a good partner, and I lost them as friend…They always come back though,lol
It goes both ways…It always has…I don’t know if you’ve noticed…
You are NOT going to get the person you want, by attacking them and getting your “friends” to gang up on them either. (That’s just a general world lesson too).
Now I am actually going to get to the topic…A long way to come!
What makes a good guy a good guy, or what makes a man to you?
Too some of my “good guy” friends they all have the same characteristics. Beard, play the same guys, same music, do the same activities, give themselves all Superhero nicknames…Pretty much all the same. They think along the lines more of “Well there are 20 other guys who are doing the same thing, so it must be alright” -.- In a small town that can be toxic!
Too me a “real man” has values, has a backbone that he sticks too. They don’t change their values according to which girl (or guy) they want to have sex with more. They will actually grab themselves by their family jewels and have a conversation with me. Rather than just attack me on Facebook in a quote I have never said.
Some of the BEST and good men I know wear dresses
They’ve had to fight and have had to be brave to come out, so they just “get it”. They get to be real, they get to just be themselves and never to lower themselves.