Nervousness Pt2

A week or so ago I made a post called “Nervouness” and it was about a job that I was going for. A job I really wanted and I really felt that I was going to get it, I nailed it. However in a little town, the ones who are already in a job in a Library, tend to get any job they go for. Which is what happened in this situation. Even though I was constantly told I would fit in so well. I’ve had a good cry about it, but I’m tired and I feel kind of stuck. I want my life to start and it’s kind of hard when you have a job that doesn’t guarantee hours. I had no work the last two months before Christmas. Luckily I’m a good saver and I start getting Christmas presents earlier. I just do not want to be in that position anymore.

I feel kind of stuck though, I want to try and maybe do something that you can do from home, but I have NO idea what to do. There are things that I could have a go at, but I can’t do too many of them cause, you know, money. It’s another reason I’m so appreciative of my Mum and my partner. I help out where I can, but I wish I could do more! I want my life to start and be able to start comfortably. My Gran wants me to keep up with my writing and I have recently restarted doing that again. I hadn’t had a good writing session in a year and it was GLORIOUS! I have a couple of fictional stories on the go, doubt I’ll ever get them published, but never say never!

Can you tell how stuck I am feeling? What have you done, readers, when you just feel like you can’t do anything, but you just have too? You don’t just want to sit around anymore?

Super Girlfriend Mode…

on-off

So this weekend is a big test for me! It’s the first “supportive” thing I will be doing as my new ‘beau’s’ partner. I am nervous for a few various reasons:

  • Posisbly will meet some members of his Family
  • Will be meeting his friends for the first time.
  • Will be in the same room as the friends who I do not like (and they don’t like me) and who I have not seen for a couple of months.

It’s a long story (as they always are) there are so many reason to feel uncomfortable and my mind is screaming “Don’t Go!!! Don’t do it!!!”. ┬áNo! Super Girlfriend Mode is on and I will be dragging (and a couple of other friends) myself out. I think it’s one of the main things I will miss about being single, if I don’t want to go somewhere…I don’t have too. I could avoid meeting people for the first time for the rest of my life! I don’t owe anyone an explanation as to why I wouldn’t want to go somewhere, I just wouldn’t go.

Hang onto your single life people!!!

(*Edit….

Will be meeting his parents (at least)
Will be surrounded by his friends who apparently dislike me (but no one, including them, will tell me why)
All the people who were suppose to be coming with me, have now pulled out.)

If I can get through tonight’s social situations, I can get through anything!