Pitbull’s and Chihuahuas

A couple of weeks ago, a group of trans women defended themselves against a man who was sexual harassing them. Of course the TERFs are all “How dare they” “He was just using words”.

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I am so sick of the disingenuity from TERFs. You know if it was a group of cis women being sexually harassed, they would be throwing them a freaking parade.

Anyway, this is one of those situations where I compare women and men to pitbulls.

Men are the pitbulls:

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Women are the Chihuahuas:

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Men have a worse reputation, because they can generally kill “easier” and do more physical harm. Yet, women seem to have a reputation that they’re sweet baby angels. Yet, we know that’s not true. Being a previous small dog owner. I know every human and animal is completely capable of violence.

We all are. I am, you are. The only difference being, is usually, and just like dogs too, is the way we are raised. Unless of course, just like dogs, we do actually have something off in our brains.

And let’s be honest here as well, a lot of the anti-maskers, a lot of the anti-lock downers, have been women saying “words”. A lot of the people causing problems in stores this year HAVE been women and just saying “words”.

Let’s just stop with the women are sweet baby angels, okay?

#LetsTalk

I am going to have to start off with not only a trigger warning, but reveal a little about myself…A faux pas about myself if you will.

I watch UK (United Kingdom) soap operas…I know…It’s tragic! Please do not hate me…

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There’s one in particular, Coronation Street, that has been absolutely moving lately. One of the main loved male characters David was raped by another male. Another character Aidan killed himself and now they are dealing with the ramifications of that. It wasn’t actually clear that Aidan had killed himself. The last episode was of him crying at the end, but you don’t see any bottles of pills or anything like that.

Although the episodes have been upsetting since. It’s been great in the respect that they are bringing men’s issues to light. Men do get raped, men do struggle with mental anxiety and sometimes even more so than women! If you follow the hashtags #Let’sTalk and #ItOkayNotToBeOkay…You can find more about it. I am so happy that they did these story lines. I do believe that men tend to struggle with mental health issues worse than women, mainly because of whole “manly” thing.

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*Please Know Men* It’s alright to talk…If you trying to talk and you don’t think your friends will let you…Get yourself some better friends and reach out! #ItsOkayNotToBeOkay

International Women’s Day

Today is officially Internationals Women’s Day…I say officially because I got all confused last week when people starting talking about “World Book Day” every where has different different dates. So I thought that I had better double check. Seems like today is the official day.

Every year there is also a theme for that year, this year the theme is #BeBoldForChange.

International Women’s Day: #BeBoldForChange website

How will you be Bold for a Change?

This is a great day to reflect and take a look at those women who we admire and why we admire them. Too take a look at ourselves and question what we can do to make the lives of others better. Not just women, but for all. I think considering the type of people who are in charge of running our countries, not just the orange Oompa Loompa, we NEED to take a long hard look at ourselves and see what we’ve become.

11 Facts about Women around the World … Do Something. Org

23 Fast Facts about Women’s Oppression Worldwide (Blog)

10 Facts about Women in the World … World Food Programme . com

Did you know: There is also an International Men’s Day, which is held on the 19th of November

Which women do you admire and why? 

Its not normal?

I was just thinking about a lot of things that have come out with the whole Presidential debates in the US and the main topic that has come out, is about assault on women. One of the main things that has come out is against the women who have come out. The main questions have been:

  1. Why did they wait so long?
  2. What were they wearing?

Of course other women have been attacking these women, which I want to say shocks me, but it doesn’t. Women are WAY worse to other women than men. In fact, I’ve seen a lot of men standing up for these women and I say kudos to those guys.

As someone who has been attacked and the majority of those women closest to me have been attacked. I can answer both of these questions quiet simply.

  1. Why did they wait so long?

The first question can be answered just from the fact that when these women do come out, they get attacked, and then in the same paragraph are asked the question “Why did they wait so long?” How can you attack someone and call them a liar, etc and then actually ask the question, like you’re genuinely shock. That once one women comes out, the others will feel safer to come forward. To me it makes logical sense, that these women feel more powerful when they are able to stand with others, ESPECIALLY against powerful men in the public eye.

2. What were they wearing?

This one irritates me a lot, for various different reasons. The biggest one being and simply put. As mentioned before I’ve been attacked and a lot of the closest females to me have also been attacked. None of us were dressed “sexy” and we were attacked by people we considered “friends” and for most of us, it was done during the bright light of the day and a couple of were attacked while other people were in different rooms. Rapists don’t attack you for what you’re wearing, it’s about power and it’s because normal people don’t rape other people. It’s just not a normal thought, for normal thinking people. My attacker was (I assume still it) bi-polar and refused to take his medication.

I think it’s what irritates me the most about the whole situation. People are not getting attacked for what they are wearing. People are getting attacked because other people do not have “normal” thought. Of course people are going to feel safer to come forward when they can stand with others. Why is this SO hard for people to comprehend?

There is also a third simple answer on why people don’t report. Brock Turner…The guy was CAUGHT raping an unconscious girl and look what happened. How much faith would you have if someone who actually got caught had, let’s face it, really nothing happen to them?

30 Days of Gratitude…Days 8 – 14

(Well this one shall be very interesting since for half of it I’ll be at a family reunion).

Day 8: Alone – My mum is gone all weekend so this means that I have the entire weekend to myself! So far it’s been bliss (mind you though I’ve had to do homework all day). One of the things that I love at being home alone for a weekend by myself is the absolute solitude. Don’t get me wrong, living with my Mum isn’t all bad. Sometimes though you do a couple of days to yourself, so you can regather yourself back together. My mum has this habit of coming home and as soon as she walks through the door is complains. Sometimes, especially on bad days I actually dread her coming home because I know she’s going to complain about something and it makes me feel worse. I am grateful to have these rare moments alone.

Day 9: Study – I have finally managed to hand in a huge project and it was a huge effort to put since it was a topic I was not interested in and it took forever. Pretty much every spare day I had was taken up with it. This entire weekend I spent working on it and I have a test I really needed to study for. The reason I am grateful for my studies though is because not only is it helping me get into the career of my dreams. I am learning different things that help me in my work. At the moment we are learning how to make web Dewey numbers, every section of Dewey that I’ve learnt I’ve been able to then help customers out where I work. Sometimes work is busy so I don’t really have time stand back and learn.

Day 10: Drama Free: So there I was thinking what am I grateful for, because nothing really happened today…but there is something to be grateful in that alone…Nothing…Only two weeks ago I was angry beyond comprehension and my ex messing me about was beyond horrible. He made me feel worthless and the pain he had and was putting me through meant nothing to him. Like he didn’t care whether I was dead or alive and then he speaks so condescendingly to me….To NOT have anything like that in my life, is calming and beautiful.

Day 11: Single-hood – So I had a HUGE test today on my toughest subject. After the tests on this subject, my brain is completely fried and I fall asleep where ever I am. It was in this moment that I’m grateful that I don’t have children and I can rest easy. I’m also grateful because though by the time I have children I will be an expert on the subject, have a good job because of my studies and be able to comfortably provide for my children.

Day 12: My bed – I know this seems like an odd one, but I am very grateful to have a bed that I can get into a night and feel safe at night. I can dream at night, feeling safe with a roof over my head and safe in my bed.

Day 13: Brother – My brother came back today to visit us as we going on a family reunion trip this weekend. The reason I am grateful for my brother isn’t because he’s done anything amazing for me. He’s done great things for me, but the reason I am grateful to have the brother that I do is because he reminds me constantly what a MAN is. My brother is a Drag Queen, and a seriously good one at that too. He has won many Australia awards for the work that he had done. While I have all these “straight manly men” telling me that a man is only a man if he has a beard, or if he has big shoulders…My 6’4′ gangly brother is being a man, by being who he truly is. He is a constant reminder that a man is not made by what is on his face (neither Steve McQueen or James Dean had a beard can I just say too) or what he hides behind. A man is a man because he has the strength to be who he truly is. THAT’S a man!

Day 14: Family – By the time you read this I will be with my family at our family reunion. I LOVE my family we are all so different but we love each so much. It’s our differences that hold us together. A round up on the “labels” of people that will be at this reunions are: gay, straight, religious, athletic, creative, intellectual, spiritual. Yet, I can guarantee that we will have the most amazing time. From all of my other friends I know how incredibly lucky that I am too have the family (mothers side) that I do…My Dad’s side, don’t even talk to each other.

Where has the girl power gone?

I call myself “Eternally Single”. I call myself this because being 30 years old I have spent most of that single. Once I’m in a relationship I am committed but when I’m single, I am single. I have done the casual sex thing and I have learnt both good and bad from that. At this moment I have no interest in that, so I will not participate in it.

However this year I have been shocked by the amount of women in my life who have been in really bad relationships. Not just bad relationships, but they were bad right from the start.  I have been shocked because these are women I admire and completely respect. They are intelligent, smart and motivated women. Who have travelled the world, found jobs they love, (some) have had children. I wont lie when I say that this women have made me feel “dumb” not through any put downs or the like from themselves. I would be struggling (thanks to my dyslexia) and getting an average of a C and they would be getting double A’s.

These women have been shocking me all year…These intelligent, beautiful, loving hearted and strong women are letting themselves be treated horribly…by a guy…and not really extraordinary guys either. Even if they were extraordinary guys it wouldn’t be acceptable.

I have one girlfriend who is actually considering going against everything that she hates and despises just so her boyfriend can sleep around more aka open relationship. Apparently because she’s been cheated on once or twice that should prove she should just be ‘used’ to be cheated on? WTactualF! She’s already said “No” several times, but he wont let it go. Another woman my grandmothers age and I woman I highly admired, sent a group email to upset a male friend of hers, so he would get in contact with her…My Grandmothers age! Then this very close family member of mine has recently told us what happened to her and how badly her now ex-husband treated her…I have no idea how they got married!

I’m sitting here feeling like a failure because I don’t have a man and I’m 30 years old…But I tell you what I’d rather be single than living with this every day of my life! These women I love and admire might as well be single!

Uploaded by PrettyExclusiveTV’s channel on 8 Jul 2012

Here is a clip from their movie “One Hour of Girl Power” where they give their own definition of what Girl Power really means.

Fantasy Men…mmm…~.^

One of the best things about being single again is being able to divulge in our little fantasies without feeling to bad or feeling like one is being disrespectful to their partner. If you press this link you can see the picture that is on my PC desktop as a wallpaper background, it makes me grin before bedtime. Thorin “Will You Join Me” Deviantart Artist:MoonFangs I would put the picture up, but there are VERY strict rules when it comes to this particular picture.

When ever I am going through a particularly rough break up or had a huge crush on someone and they choose someone else, I tend to focus on my fantasy men. Anything that I may have imagined with that particular boyfriend/ex/crush, there image is taken over by one of my “fantasy men”. I find it extremely helpful and I find it helps me move on. I don’t know why, I can’t explain of why thinking of someone I don’t know or some make believe character helps me to move on from a “real” person, but it does. Maybe it’s because I’m not thinking about them 24/7 instead… Or you know…I’m just crazy =P

 

 

My Friend

I miss you,
I never thought that I would,
I guess there is truth too,
“You never know what you’ve got till it’s gone”

Surrounded by boys playing with barbie dolls,
Guys who call me “beautiful” with no meaning behind it,
My heart aches,
For the special smile that only you could put on my face.

I want to scream,
I want to shout,
My heart is screaming out for you to reach out,
I miss you…My friend ❤