I agree

*nods head*

Bill and Melinda Gates says that marrying the right person is more important than your career

I find it true because if you have the right person, then they can support you in your career. I know of a person who got married to someone whose chosen career meant they were more than likely going to be travelling a lot and the other worked in retail. Then came the time when they realised they were to going have to move, the marriage lasted only a year after that.

I never understood why they got married, when one person wasn’t really willing to make the commitment, and it was obvious. It’s interesting though because the person not willing to move is still single. The one with the career, is now in a happy relationship.

Whereas my cousin who works in retail, is married to a Doctor. My cousin understood early on that he was probably going to have to move, and since he worked in retail (like the other person) it was easier for him to come with, rather than stay. They are still going strong.

Basically it is more important to have the right partner than a job, otherwise there will be no marriage.

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Progress

*This is entirely a random thought I had while drinking a cup of tea one day*

Rome wasn’t built in a day, the Civil Act took more than one march, Women to vote took more than one suffragette meeting.

Keep up the good fighting!

Let this be the last Vote for Yes when it comes the Marriage Equality!

Love and Marriage

So I have DESPERATELY been trying to think of something to write under this Category. It feels a little wrong to write about how great being single is when you are actually happy in a relationship (for the first time in my life).

Over the weekend though, I read this very interesting article Love after Marriage has ended and it slightly frightened me a bit. I certainly hope this is not the case. To break the article down, there is a woman whose neighbour is elderly and has been in mourning since her neighbour has known her. They had a conservation that went like this:

“Is your husband coming home?”

“What?” I replied, with the look on my face that you imagine I would have.

“Your husband? He come home?”

“Ummm, nope.”

“You here alone?”

“I’m here with my kids,” I said. “That’s definitely not alone.”

“It’s no good,” she said sadly. “You need a husband.

And off she went, feeling very sorry for my state of affairs. Bless. If only she knew what goes on in my head. The truth is, I’m really grappling with this love business, or more specifically love after marriage.

It made me think. Even after years of knowing this, we still make such a huge fuss about the Wedding Day…How many of us talk or even think about the afterwards? Being Single is a great time to have a long hard think about this, of course as usual Life can dictate changes. But that is something else to think about, how much would you be willingly to change? How much are you willing to compromise?

What is marriage to you? What does spending the rest of your life with someone, mean to you? Do you even want to get married?

I think the problem with these day and age (just my opinion) we have so many options out there, we don’t know how to just stick to something. anymore. We always want more NOW, instantaneously. If we don’t get it, we just can take off.

Anton Chekhov

Time Warp…

This is such a sweet news article and I just had to share it…”Australia’s oldest couple sell time warp Mosman home after 76 years”

In 1938 this couple bought the only home (at the time) in the suburb of Mosman. They bought it so many years ago that it was in the same year as Sydney held the “Commonwealth Games” but it was also known back then as “The Empire Games”. This was during a time when a average family home cost around $1000 and a loaf of bread was only a sixpence.

Tom and Jean, the owners of the house, are both over a 100 years old, and while they are both very much alive and kicking. They can no longer take care of their own home and are moving into a nursing home. The amazing thing about this house is that it still has the same fittings and the same furniture from when they first moved in. The house is in complete pristine condition and looking at the pictures you would think you have taken a step back in time.

The other thing that stood out to me reading this article was when they asked him about giving any advice about marriage. Tom replied with “I don’t really think I can give them advice but I don’t think people stick at marriage anymore,’’ he said…Wise words I think…

Where has the girl power gone?

I call myself “Eternally Single”. I call myself this because being 30 years old I have spent most of that single. Once I’m in a relationship I am committed but when I’m single, I am single. I have done the casual sex thing and I have learnt both good and bad from that. At this moment I have no interest in that, so I will not participate in it.

However this year I have been shocked by the amount of women in my life who have been in really bad relationships. Not just bad relationships, but they were bad right from the start.  I have been shocked because these are women I admire and completely respect. They are intelligent, smart and motivated women. Who have travelled the world, found jobs they love, (some) have had children. I wont lie when I say that this women have made me feel “dumb” not through any put downs or the like from themselves. I would be struggling (thanks to my dyslexia) and getting an average of a C and they would be getting double A’s.

These women have been shocking me all year…These intelligent, beautiful, loving hearted and strong women are letting themselves be treated horribly…by a guy…and not really extraordinary guys either. Even if they were extraordinary guys it wouldn’t be acceptable.

I have one girlfriend who is actually considering going against everything that she hates and despises just so her boyfriend can sleep around more aka open relationship. Apparently because she’s been cheated on once or twice that should prove she should just be ‘used’ to be cheated on? WTactualF! She’s already said “No” several times, but he wont let it go. Another woman my grandmothers age and I woman I highly admired, sent a group email to upset a male friend of hers, so he would get in contact with her…My Grandmothers age! Then this very close family member of mine has recently told us what happened to her and how badly her now ex-husband treated her…I have no idea how they got married!

I’m sitting here feeling like a failure because I don’t have a man and I’m 30 years old…But I tell you what I’d rather be single than living with this every day of my life! These women I love and admire might as well be single!

Uploaded by PrettyExclusiveTV’s channel on 8 Jul 2012

Here is a clip from their movie “One Hour of Girl Power” where they give their own definition of what Girl Power really means.

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The times they are a-changing

Having a conversation with a good girlfriend tonight and we are shocked…repeat SHOCKED…by the amount of guys that are in relationships and/or married that hit on us. Both my girlfriend and I are single and these “respectable taken” men are not helping the cause. There are a few things that make me really mad about it:

1. How can you call my ex a douche when you’re doing what you’re doing? He didn’t make promises of marriage or anything close to that.
2. Most…in fact, pretty much all of them…claim to be bi-sexuals…I’m not sure if they think that they gives them a special permission to hit on other people while married or something?
3. What makes them think I’d ever go for a married man to begin with? I never have and never would…I am not desperate and there are a lot more guys out there that are not someone’s sloppy seconds.
4. What makes me angriest the most though…My brother is gay, my cousin is gay…Yet these…Wankers…are able to get married and STILL hit on single people, like myself.
5. I have not seen ONE of them hit on a guy…Just single girls…But this is who Christians really want representing them?…Really? Both my brother and cousins have been in long term committed relationships and neither one has ever been accused of straying. Yet, they can’t marry and these guys can.
6. You never hear of their partners being bi-sexual…Amazing, isn’t it.

All these guys are doing is harming myself and my girlfriends and relationships in general. We are single for a reason and these guys are a huge part of that. I can think of maybe one or two couples who don’t seem to do this.

We obsess over characters like Thorin and Thor and Mr Darcy because the truth is, to find a decent guy (I still believe that they are out there still) is getting harder and harder to find. These guys damage the rest of you guys and put single girls like me off.

Odd one out…

Last night my best friend came in from Interstate. I have about three female best friends and ironically I could probably pick a “Sex in the City” character for each one of us (I would be the Charlotte in the group…but probably more after being influenced by Samantha). The interesting thing about my little groups of girlfriend is…I am the only single one.

Last night was fun and we talked and giggled a lot, but it was hard to hear about the problems they were having, especially when their guys are completely nuts about them. They are mostly things that they knew could be an issue later. I think that’s the hardest thing about being single, especially when you are the only one, is listening to how bad a friends relationships is, when it really isn’t and that they knew this issue would be coming up later.

I would LOVE a man who was devoted to me, who had my back, who talked to me, who tried to cheer me up when I am down. I have always had the opposite in my life. I have always had the guy who never had my back, including watching me get bullied mentally and physically by his roommate, the one who’d rather play a computer game then take care of me the night my grandfather dies, would rather spend Valentine’s Day with his friends than me.

I don’t get into relationships a lot, in fact, after 30 years I have only been in three relationships. My main problem is once I find that guy, I jump right in, and instead of letting it build up slowly and making sure that I am not falling for a façade. Except if I knew about a major issue, like children, marriage, career plans are likely to become an issue later I would never get into that relationship. I seem to find a lot that I am the only one like that. A lot of girls will get into a relationship to be in a relationship and that’s when the problems start.

True, I have nights where I feel so alone that I hold onto that pillow like I never have before…but I also know that one of the worst feelings in this world is feeling completely alone while you have someone lying right next to you.

Am I the only one who might WANT a relationship, but don’t feel like I NEED one? Am I the only odd one out…I would rather be alone, than feel alone.

 

The Single Womans Blogging challenge Day 21-28

Here is the last group of the Single Woman’s Blogging Challenge and I nearly forgot to do it! It’s been a great experience, it’s been giving me a reason to continuously Blog and I’ve let you in the Blog world know things about myself that I don’t think I’ve even told my friends about.

Anyone who is interested in taking up this challenge (I think guys could do this as well, that’s just me) should check out this link (I don’t know what I’ll do with myself now) :

 

The Single Woman 30 day blogging challenge, published 2013

22)   What fictional character in a movie, tv show, or book do you identify with and why?

Oh my goodness this is a tough one! I love the fictional word (for those who couldn’t guess) and there are so many different fictional characters I relate too. I also feel that I’ve related to certain different characters at different times.  I relate to movies/books like The Hobbit, Lord of the Rings just because a lot of people agree that that would be the world for me! Or a place like Narnia, I guess characters that come from a feudal type of world…but with much better health facilities, lol. I guess I don’t relate to a character, but more I relate to the characters in a particular type of world.

23)   Talk about a moment when you got annoyed with a married friend, a person in a relationship, or a person with kids (Be honest! No judgment!)

I am constantly getting annoyed! I don’t know many people who make me want a relationship or to be a mother to be honest. I see so many bad parents and people who are constantly cheating or are in relationships for the wrong reasons. There are one or two couples that make me go “Awww” but they are very few. As for parents…Damn some of them are SO bad! I literally will tell my partners that they never have to worry about getting myself pregnant on purpose and then I go into the horror stories. Some of these parents are my best contraceptive, lol

24)   If you could relive ONE day of your life, what would it be? And would you change anything?

Once again there are so many that I’m not sure I could ever choose. There are two that I wish I could change in particular. One would be I would have stayed longer in the room when my great grandfather was dying (I was only two and seeing him hooked up to the machine freaked me out). The other would be there is one person in particular that I would tell them just how much I loved them instead of being so frightened and assuming that they knew. Being older and wiser, although I know they know that I love them, they will never understand how much and why and now I’m not really in a position to tell them.

25)   Describe a moment when you “paid it forward.” What happened and how did it feel?

I feel like I am always paying it forward, someone does something friendly or unexpectedly friendly for me and this puts me in a good mood that I go and do something for someone else.

26)   Name a song that makes you cry every time you hear it and why

The song that gets me every single time without fail is from the “Phantom of the Opera” and it’s called “Wishing you were somehow here again”. It reminds me of those who have passed on before me and who I miss…Because I always wish that they were still here.

27)   Talk about something that you really, really, really love about yourself.

I have a hard couple of years of extreme self-doubt, but the thing I love about myself the most is my loyalty. I am discovering how rare this attribute actually is. Even when I am completely down on myself I am so happy for anyone else that I care about and will always help and support in what ways that I can. It shocks me how many girls will wake up in a bitchy mood and just go “Oh I’m going to be a bitch today because that’s the way I woke up” (it also shocks me just how many guys worship these girls too).

28)   Describe a moment when you made a big, bold move. In any area of life: Career, Love, etc.

Definitely love! I had never had a serious relationship until I met my first serious boyfriend at the age of 21. I had had boyfriends, but they’d only last a couple of months, I have no idea why I had no interest in relationships during high school, I just didn’t I guess. So what do I do for the first time I fall in love? I don’t just go and date some local boy, oh no I had to go to the extreme and fall in love with someone from a completely different country. It was hugely rewarding though, although the first time I went over my ex went to the wrong terminal…For about an hour I was panicking that I had been stood up in a different country! lol…We ended up being together for 3 years and we are still really good friends.