So it’s been kind of a bad day

A few years ago Australia voted for #lovewins. Where Australia voted to legalise lgbtq marriage. Love Wins is what people used when it was voted Yes…Australia and Love wins that day.

Over night while you’ve all been sleeping, NSW voted, for their state elections. Now we are having a federal election in May, where we vote for a new prime minister. However, over night NSW decided to stick with it’s conservative. It’s upset a lot of people because they just assume (like I’m sure a lot of you all do) NSW (aka Sydney) is overly progressive…NSW is NOT a progressive state and I realised this when we had the #lovewins vote (which is why I brought it up).

NSW, although did vote “Yes” They also only JUST voted Yes in NSW. NSW had the lowest voters for Yes out of the whole country. NSW have the biggest parades, the biggest parties, they have the Mardi Gras but that means nothing when your also the state with the most rich, “scared” and white people in the country.

The day after the Christchurch/New Zealand mass shootings. For some unknown reason, the Sydney television AND radio shows had members from One Nation on. For those who don’t know, One Nation is probably our racist “party”. One member decided to put in a policy to say “It’s okay to be white”. The leader of One Nation came dressed in a Burqa, and was subsequently laughed at. You might have heard of #eggboy? A young kid egged a One Nation senator, because the senator basically said that the Muslim people had it coming. Which is why eggboy is such a hero in Australia. Now one of them has gained a seat.

I think it’s very safe to say now that NSW is not a progressive state. You’d think it would be though? Clearly not ALL NSW though,lol

Share Your Heartfelt World <3

Share Your Heartfelt World

Share Your World

QUESTIONS:

What’s your favorite way to spend a weekend?

It depends what the week has been like to be honest. It’s been a busy week, I do not want to do a thing. I just want to play games and read. If it’s been a quiet week, then I want to get out and about. Even if it’s just to do the grocery shopping, I just need to get out. I am a homebody but even I go stir crazy if I stay inside too long.

Who do you admire most in the world?

I admire a lot of people, it’d be hard to bring it down to just one person. I’ve been finding over the last couple of years that it’s all about the quality, not the quantity.

 What do you regret not doing?

I don’t know how honest I should be, because I’m happy now and I don’t honestly consider any of my exs as the ones “who got away”…because I am now with “the one”. There was one guy years ago, I used to wonder “What if I had” and wish that I had. I’m not sure if I “regret”, more had wished sometimes I had taken a different path, and then glad I didn’t, because I’m happy now. I do regret not walking away from some people sooner, but then maybe I wouldn’t be where I am now.

If you see a puddle on the ground, do you walk around it or over/in it?

Wooo, good question! I had to actually think about it. I am pretty sure that I try to go over it. If it’s too big, I obviously go around, but most of the time I try to go over. Probably because I’m headed straight and am just focusing on going straight.


This week, instead of gratitude/thankful for question(s), I’m asking romantic, squishy booby hug, possibly sappy and overly sugary QUESTIONS about love:

If you have an S.O. or spouse,  how do you know that they want to make love, without them saying a word?

He tends to just come up behind me and “bumps” me,lol…He has a sensitive stomach, so when he can bump his stomach…Usually means he’d like to do the deed,lol

What’s the most romantic gesture your lover has ever done for you?

In all honesty it was in the middle of the night and I was having an anxiety attack, and he could feel me trying to get myself together and he kept asking me if I was alright. I just felt like I couldn’t speak, so he just hugged/cuddled me and I just melted,lol.

What items would your romantic dinner for two contain?

Probably something completely different from each other,lol.

Does your lover make your heart pound and your pulses race or is it a more comfortable together, I’m so glad (s)he is with me kind of thing?   Do they make your heart melt?

He just makes me happy, especially when I can make him smile. I love it when I can get him to smile. He makes my heart happy.

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Share Your World, Feb Wk1, 2019

Share Your World

Share Your World, 2-4-19

QUESTIONS:

What’s wrong but sounds right?

I have honestly been having a hard time answering this one. I keep trying to think of putting two things that I enjoy, but too others is gross. I just can’t think of anything really good.

What physical action or gesture do you find romantic?

It depends on the person. My current partner, I love it when he gives me cuddles, just because. Mainly because he’s not really an emotional person. A few months ago I realised in the middle of the night that I was about have a anxiety attack, so I did what I’d do to calm myself and I woke up. He woke up too and asked me what was wrong, I couldn’t speak, so he just hugged me and it made feel so much better.

What’s something you really resent paying for?

I haven’t 100% yet resented for paying for something…Yet. There is something I bought recently that has me worried, mainly because it’s not here yet. I bought a preorder figurine in August last year, and at first the date for release kept changing. They have recently contacted me (after ignoring my last two messages) saying that they’ve been sent, so it should be here by the end of February. So we’ll see…It’s a figurine I really want too. I do buy some clothes online.

What’s your favorite romance movie?  A movie you may find romantic, even if that’s not the genre.  I’ve been watching a lot of those lately, loosely titled “romance movie” and found a surprising number of dramas, action and comedy among the hearts and flowers.

I am so weird! My favourite “romance” movies are usually the dark type. Someone dies, someone doesn’t get the girl, but they kind of do…But the other guy never really has the girl “heart”…metaphorically.  They are usually musicals as well. I have never really gotten into “romance” films. I find them kind of predictable and sort of boring.

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And of course we have our gratitude of the week question:

I am grateful that my puppy is still here with us. I don’t think she’ll ever be 100% again. She has pooped, after a few days of not popping. She ate today after not eating for two days. Still walks in circle. In all honesty, I think my Gran, who we asked to look after her, is stressing her out. Mainly because her mind seems to be going as well. It’s been stressful to leave my dog, when she leaves all the doors closed, so my dog can’t bathroom anywhere else but the rugs. I thought it was interesting that when my Mum offered to take my Gran out for lunch, so she didn’t go stir crazy being inside our house all day. That’s what my dog started to eat again.

My dog helped me when I had my first huge anxiety attack. We went walking together, so I didn’t become all agoraphobic.

You ARE Enough – Mandy Hale Days 21 – 30

Mandy Hale – You are Enough 30 day challenge

Day 22: In Chapter Sixteen, I discuss “Why We Cling to People Who Don’t Love Us.” Talk about a time when you clung to someone who didn’t love you, why you think you had such a hard time letting go, and how you finally tapped into your inner “enough-ness” to walk away.

As I have mentioned before, when my Grandfather passed away, I really didn’t like the guy I was dating at the time. When my Pa died I realised one of two things 1)He’s a coward and 2) I think unless I cheated on him, he was never going to love me. I know why now I still didn’t want to break up. I was worried about losing anyone else, literally anyone else. So I put up with a lot, but in the end, I know that I was making problems. Though it honestly, it wasn’t that hard. My ex’s room mate was such a bully towards me, which is why initially I didn’t leave my ex, because it was his room mate, not him, and his room mate is SO easy to rile up. I still think they slept together.

There was a definite me being a third wheel in my own relationship deal.

The day we broke up, I had just done clothes washing. Their clothes dryer, you had to clean out a filter, his room mate had been washing before and did NOT clean it out, laziest person ever! So I come along, clean it out, put my clothes in, didn’t put the washing on, I went off to do a couple of other things. He comes in and starts going off his top, never seen such an over reaction, not only did my ex not stick up for me over a ridiculous over reactions over his room mates not cleaning up after himself. When my ex came into his bedroom, I made a joke “Has the Princess calm down yet?” and he STORMED OUT! Then I go to work, on my way back I ring to see if they want anything and my “boyfriend” says to me “You’re only welcomed back if you don’t cause trouble”. We broke up that day. I actually nearly didn’t go back, I hang up on him and I was shaking, I was SO angry. He still thinks my phone stopped working. I also pretended to cry when we broke up.

Day 23: Today is my 40th birthday! Write about a milestone or significant birthday.

I’d have to say it was my 30th, not only was it a fantastic party. I had a “Fantasy Theme: Moulin Fantasy”. Dress up as your favourite character, but Moulin Rouge theme. Things really started to change for me when I turned 30 though. Finally got sick of my ex’s back stabbing me within 24 hours of us breaking up, went off. Found a job, not my dream job, but I adore the people who work there. Also the year that I met my current partner, and we still haven’t had a fight! It’s also the year though, that my health started to deteriorate. Ironically it was my ex that caused it, but that’s a story for another day!

Day 24: In Chapter Seventeen, I talk about “Moving On,” metaphorically and literally. Discuss a time when you found the courage to move on from a toxic situation, relationship, or environment.

As I’ve mentioned before, my now ex-friend actually blocked me and accused me of being this horrible human being. Although I had wanted too stopped being friends with them. There was so much relief after all that. Who would have thought saying “I don’t want to be treated like s^!t anymore” Got rid of the people who were treating me like s^!t”. Although only one of them blocked me, the other accused me of being passive aggressive, which was hilarious, since that’s what she has been doing herself. The other… the other didn’t notice what had happened for at least two weeks. Yet she apparently still keeps posting about how she may be quiet, but she’s observant -.- That should tell you everything! They are like those “Christians” who are not actually that Christian.

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Day 25: In Chapter Eighteen, I become a “Church Chaser”!  Share your own story of faith. Your beliefs, your journey to find a church or place of worship, and how believing in a higher power has impacted your life.

I am not really religious, I am definitely more agnostic than anything else. Spiritual, not religious. It gives me an incredible feeling to find out more about the religions. I also find sometimes, people will use their Religion to discriminate. It’s very much like Chinese Whispers. I definitely feel like there are things that we don’t understand about out there, and all those “gut moments”.

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Day 26: In Chapter Nineteen, I share the story of a dear friend who took her own life. Talk about how suicide has touched your life or the life of someone dear to you.

I have not had any really close to me “suffered” from suicide. I know of people close to me. The sad thing is, I think they use it at lot for their own bad behaviour. I think she loved her father, but that doesn’t stop her from having NPD. There is someone who I haven’t actually met, but she is dear too me (online buddy) and I think she recently lost her brother suddenly, but I didn’t want to indulge to deep, unless she was okay with it.

Day 27: In Chapter Twenty, I talk about how I finally learned to “Let It Be.” Talk about what these three words mean to you. What does “letting it be” look like? How do you practice just “letting it be”?

“Let it Be” comes to me, in a song. Honestly when I hear “Let It Be” and what honestly it means to me, is “The Beatles” song “Let It Be”.

Day 28: Also in Chapter Twenty, I talk about what my own “Happy Ending” looks like now, after everything I’ve learned. What does YOUR Happy Ending look like? In love and in life?

I’d love to be married to my best friend, I am so lame! I just want all the usual stuff, marriage, a couple of babies. I would love to have my own little business, enough so I can live comfortably. I just want everyone I love to be happy and healthy, that’s it. I would love to be able to make enough to take care about everybody.

Day 29: In the epilogue, I talk about how the journey to “enough-ness” is never complete. Talk about your own journey to enough-ness, and how you’ve learned to embrace who you are, flaws and all.

Over the last couple of years, I have stopped worrying so much. It still hurts when I think someone wants to disappear from my life (but ironically, a lot of people I’ve lost. I was the one that introduced them to my friends that still are there). I’ve been having to let that go a whole lot, it’s too hard to keep worrying. I AM a good person, am I perfect? Most definitely not, but I also find that’s what gives me a step up. A lot of people want to do the whole social media “My life is perfect” and I am so not like that anymore,lol. I also find though a lot of people on here, are going through the same thing I am. It’s great, I think it’s helped me a lot, to embrace my flaws.

Day 30: The book is called, You Are Enough: Heartbreak, Healing, and Becoming Whole. Which one are you? Talk about which phase you’re in right now – heartbreak, healing, or becoming whole – and the biggest thing you’ve learned about yourself in this season.

Honestly, I am clearly in heartbreak. My dog hasn’t passed, but she’s definitely not going to be here for more years, like we thought. She’s 13 a Chihuahua and apart from a couple of ear infections, she’s never had any health issues. She’s wobbly and is sleeping a lot, but she’s eating, not pooping (which worries me a little). She has started to perk up again whenever someone heads to the front door. It’s hard. I know that’s not what this question relates too, but it’s all I can think about right now. Not only do I completely love her, but I’ve always called her my unofficial therapy dog.

Pippy Loo

Share Your World Jan, Week 2? 2019

Share Your World

Share Your World 14-1-19

QUESTIONS THIS WEEK:

  • You’re walking in a forest and you find a black suitcase.  Inside it is one millions dollars and a piece of paper, stained in blood and bearing the single word “Don’t!”  Would you take the suitcase home or leave it?

I would so totally leave it! No money is worth my life, especially if it’s killer money and it kills me. Then I can’t spend it anyway! … I think I got carried away…KILLER MONEY!!!

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  • Imagine you lapsed and cheated on your partner. You feel horrible and you know you’ll never do it again, because the feeling is so awful. Would you confess?

No! That’s a horrible thought really. I have never cheated. I can’t imagine that I ever would. However, if I did. I wouldn’t say anything. I’m one of those people that thinks that by telling your partner you’re not doing it to not hurt them, you are doing it for yourself. That’s still a selfish move on the cheaters part. I feel like people only tell their partners when they want to get out of the relationship, but they don’t have the guts to actually break up…For whatever reasons.

  • Would you live your life differently if nobody ever judged you for anything you did?

Oh dear god…YES! A couple of months ago, I put an ANZAC symbol over my Facebook profile picture, one of those Facebook portraits. Even though the people in my family who actually fought liked it, my Mum rang me to tell me how disrespectful she found it. Like, she never rings to tell me “I am so proud of you” It’s like with a lot of people really, quick to be negative, never heard anything positive. I had to really convince myself that if the ANZACS didn’t find it offensive (and these family members would tell me and they definitely wouldn’t like it either) the my mother can get over herself,lol

I don’t know why people don’t understand if you do nothing but criticise, why would I believe you believe in me? I am nearly 35 and my Mum still gives me that up and down look of what I’m wearing…35! It doesn’t help that my brother is very fashion conscious, I’m just not,lol

  • Would a fly without wings be called a walk? No? What would you call it?

I don’t know?! A soar? I’m not honestly sure,lol

grat

What’s something that brought joy and lightness of being to you this past week?

Seeing my kitty cat getting back to a some what “normal self”. He’s been having seizures about once a year, so we’ve kept trying different medications. This last one seemed to really knock him about, he was so lethargic and he wasn’t really drinking. He seems to be getting a little better, like he’s gotten used to the tablets, but the twitches have come back. Is it horrible to say that I don’t mind, because he seems to be much better.

Women vs Women

Wife’s permanent punishment husbands infidelity

This is something I have never understood and don’t think that I will ever understand. I have always thought that women were harsher to each other than men can be. Even with the fact that men can over physically power us most of the time, it always women who seem to want to drag us down with the guys.

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I am a woman…I don’t do this…Whenever I’ve been cheated on I don’t blame the girl, I blame the guy I’m in a relationship in. I might get angry with the girl, except if she genuinely didn’t know he was my partner. I don’t blame her though. I blame him…I also don’t think cheating is the worse thing you can do to your partner. I think raping and abusing your partner is much worse, but as my own partner pointed out. One could consider that cheating is emotional or mental abuse.

That’s a different topic for a different day though.

Take Dr Ford of example, it didn’t shock what a lot of men were saying, but it was shocking what the women were saying. Mainly because it was so stupid what they were saying and as women, they should have known better.

The one thing they kept saying over and over again was that they Dr Ford was doing it for the fame. Except it is such a ludicrous statement because how many women, off of the top of your head, do you even know of, who have became famous or rich after making an accusation? I honestly could think of no one. Except for Dr Ford, but for more obvious reasons. Even saying that, I believe she is still in hiding.

So to say that people do this for the fame and the money, is just stupid. How many of them said they would never put their attacker through what Dr Ford was doing. Why? Even if you wouldn’t, doesn’t mean that Dr Ford can’t. She believes it was the right thing to do and personally I would as well.

Is it primal? Is that why women attack other women? Is that why instead of blaming the partner, they blame the other women? Have we not grown since the cave ages? My brain literally cannot get it.

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Jodie Whittaker as “The Doctor”

…I absolutely adore her! I am so glad that I didn’t jump on any of the bandwagons of ‘hate’.

I completely forgot to watch the first episode and I had literally had been talking about it the day before and how I had to remember it. I managed to find it and I have been loving it ever since. She kind of reminds of the last three Doctors combined. I think she is utter perfection when it comes to “The Doctor”.

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I did it…Kind of…

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote a Blog called “I wish…” where I was writing about how I wanted to try and find some way some random messages to my family and friends. Without it being totally creepy and without them knowing it’s me. So far, apart from post it notes, I haven’t really been able to do it.

However…

I have started to do it randomly around my city instead. I’ve been trying to do it “ninja style”. I’m trying not to get caught, make sure that it wont be discovered for a while and when I’m long gone…You are the only ones who know about it!

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