It should go without saying…

If you don’t talk to the people actually involved, why are you speaking for them?

Too me, it seems, if you don’t talk to trans people about trans issues, maybe don’t talk or make decisions about them. If you don’t talk to sex workers, don’t talk or make decisions about them.

I’m looking at you UK!

But this does apply generally.

I will write about a example though of when you should sort of debate with yourself, who you should listen to within these groups too.

Debbie Hayton is a trans woman, or not, depending on whether you are a “TRA” or a TERF or Gender Critical. Debbie is a trans woman though, who frequently (meaning all the time) sides with transphobic people. One thing she has said is “trans people are not marginalised, and I am trans!”. Now the problem with this, is one, Debbie is a late tranisitioner. Which in itself is not a problem, plenty of people transition later in life. But the reason for Hayton transitioning later? As she admitted herself, not because she didn’t know she was trans, but to protect her children from bullies.

Now…

If being trans isn’t marginalised, why do you (commendably) need to protect your children?

Like, if there’s no problem with transitioning … Surely you can just do it whenever you want? You wouldn’t need to worry about protecting your children. Take POC, a lot of POC parents have to talk to their children about how to be when they’re confronted by the police.

That’s just common sense, right?

Hayton is one example, by what I mean when I say, actually LISTEN.

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Listen to what they DON’T say

Have you all heard of that saying “No answer is a answer”? Well, that’s what a lot of TERFs, GCs and the BBC are doing right now. I wont go into huge detail about it. Needless to say, no one knows what the BBC is even trying to play right now. It’s 2021, we can see everything.

My main point of this blog, is to listen to what someone DOESN’T say.

There is only thing I’ll say about the Cade situation. At least she’s being honest, with how she feels. Which isn’t a good thing (think when Melania Trump said about how Trump is honest with everything he says).

However, the lack of transphobic people calling it out. Is very LOUD.

This is what I mean by listening to what someone doesn’t say. Someone may say “Of course I condemn what she said” but then they’ll give you a brush off, or a “gloss over”. Where they demand something in return for them condemning it, which of course, as we all know, eliminates the “of course I condemn it”.

NoelaaBFierced

I feel like I’m being listened too…

The last couple of weeks, haven’t just been mentally exhausting, but they’ve been great as well!

I really honestly feel like people are actually listening to what I’m saying, and that is a amazing feeling!

If you’ve been reading my blog for a bit now, you might have seen me write about a huge anxiety attack I had about a job. Well I also recently changed, what we called, a job provider. They have been amazing, I actually feel like they get what I’m talking about. They keep making me feel that they will actually work with me, rather than me trying to make them “look good”.

Recently, I have put in two complaints…I’m wont get too deep in it. But, I actually feel like these two companies ARE listening. In the past when I’ve put in a complaint, I felt like the people meant to protect people, sided with the bigots. I felt condescended too, but also there was a moment of clarity of “Well, that’s why that person’s still working there. Their company is totally fine with it”.

Politicians, seriously?

Is there ANY point to politicians at this point?

Here is Australia, NSW (so Sydney) had a massive (for Australia) explosion of COVID cases, recently. Just a couple of weeks after our completely bias PM said that NSW was the gold standard. Now, not only for the last couple of months NSW has been doing the worst (lol). But then their state “leader” Gladys Berejiklian, has said she’s not doing any more daily pressers…what’s the point. The next day…

Sydney beaches CLOSED as THOUSANDS flock to shorelines on sunny Saturday despite COVID-19 lockdown restrictions in NSW

Starting to see why Sydney is never in the top lists of any livable cities.

There are GOOD politicians, unfortunately, the ones with any common sense ie the one who LISTEN, seem to be not listened too, except by their own people. Like Merkel and Ardern. Which is probably why they do well. Funny that, isn’t that? Politicians to actually listen, rather than do what they want too, do well. The ones who are not in it for the money, and are in it for the people, do well, lol.

I’m going to make a spreadsheet or graph or something, about politicians who listen and those who don’t.

“Reading” Your Body Signals

Do you like that title? lol

With this post, I am talking more about listening to your general body signs.

Just the little knicks and knacks.

As a example, I know I’m cold when I’m in bed and I wake up and my feet are cold. If I do not put those socks on, I am more likely to wake up with a flu or a cold. During Winter, I have a warm shower before bed, so I don’t always put my socks on after. However, they are always by by bed…Just in case. It could also just be really bad circulation in my feet, lol

You know those old “wives tales” like “you can feel it’s going to rain in your bones” but it does actually happen.

Thursday Theories – My Anxiety

Now the purpose of this blog post. While I will talk about something that I think I’ve realised about my own anxiety. This post is, (I hope) a informed post about listening to your bodies. Which includes listening to your mind.

Our bodies are well equipped to let us know when something is “off”.

Over the last few months, I have experienced really odd flushes. I wouldn’t call them hot flushes, but they’re more like shaky flushes. Almost like when, I assume, your blood levels go low. However, when I’ve been tested, I haven’t got anything wrong. I decided to start taking note of when I get these shakes. I started to noticed that I get them when I’m getting really annoyed or fed up. It can even be something as simple as, I’m clearly not listening or am listening, but have to pay attention to something (haha), but the person whose talking to me, expects my full attention. It can be something literally that simple.

So I have started to think that it’s probably got more to do with my anxiety tablets, than anything else. As a kind of side effect, I guess you might call it.

I believe when my brain starts to get annoyed, it must be increasing something in my brain and the tablets are sending out weird signals. My brain on the anxiety tablet handles when I become annoyed, by making me feel like I’m going to faint.

I didn’t want to look it up on Google, as you all know what can happen then!

I could only really find though really, how anxiety can make you feel dizzy…which duh…There was a couple of things that did talk about it being a side affect.

The point of this?

When you have a illness, whether it be physically or mental. Yes, even spiritual.

We tend to listen to the Doctors, Nurses, family etc. And ignore what we think is going on. We just pass things off. Don’t do this. Listen to your body, your gut, your mind.

My “theory” is that our body are the best judges of what our body is going through. I know we tend to brush these things off, but do not. Take notes, if you must. Day, time and what you felt.

In my mid-long life, I have learnt

You can’t tell the people you know, anything, haha.

No matter who much someone you know may be surrounded by others, who know what they’re talking about. No matter how much someone you know may see those around talk about their experiences, about how real something is. No matter who many people someone you know may lose from their lives, because of their “No, not listening”. Some people just will not listen, will they?

I’m not just talking about when someone asks you for advice, and then they don’t take it. I think everyone does that. Although, depending on who it is, you might do. I’m also talking about how smart people around you, might be talking about how real COVID is, or something like that. Yet, someone you know, will take a picture of a leaflet they got in the mail saying how “fake” COVID is.

Not that I’m looking at anyone in my family in particular about that.

You know what I mean? Especially when you are Facebook “friends” with people who have actually had COVID. It’s just weird, lol

One more time…and for those in the back

I’m going to break this down, instead of writing a rant…again. Yes, POC can do bad and evil things. What I’m tired of though, people acting like white women are delicate little flowers. So here is a list of everything that white women were the majority of women supporters for. Please don’t make me have to write “not all white women”, because clearly no. What I am about to list though, are where white women are the majority when it comes to supporting something, or not supporting something. That actually would be detrimental to them, women.

The majority of white women, support:

• Trump … Which is still shocking to me, and never should have happened.
• Racism
• TERF’s
• And Gender Critical men who are abusive and derogatory towards cis and trans women.
• Other Karen’s
• Piers Morgan. Not only that but when I’ve tried to explain to other white woman why Sharon Osbourne was wrong for shouting over her WOC co-stars. I was told that they didn’t agree with me, because Sharon didn’t understand. Weren’t we all told that when you don’t understand something, you TOTALLY shout over that person… -.-
• Hating on Meghan Markle. They blame her for the “downfall” for the Royal Family, while ignoring that the Royal family are currently protecting Prince Andrew. Also they forget how Princess Diana was treated, by the exact same people that they are now defending. Which is why the majority of people believe Harry and Meghan. Just not white women, lol.
• They did support burning witches, wizards and dogs.
• Alex Salmond
• Boris Johnson
• Women who call themselves “trans widows” Which is freaking disrespectful!
• Apparently they also now all support bullying and harassing co-workers in the work place : Re Maya Forstater and JKRowling.

They don’t support, but they should, because it helps protects not only themselves but also people who they say they “love”.

• Anti-Masks
• Anti-BLM
• Emmett Till, was executed for flirting with a white woman. Then it turns that the flirting DIDN’T EVEN HAPPEN!
• Although women are treated WAY more harshly when they cry about a fake rape, as opposed to people who do rape others. The women crying fake rape, the majority are white. Also all of them give excuses, which people just excuse them for.
• Social Justice.
• The Law.
• Justice in general.

LISTEN!!! When did that stop???

*Long Rant Post Incoming. I have lot to say about people who do not listen anymore*

In all honesty, this is probably the only place I actually feel listened to anymore. So you know that post about how I hate birthdays? Well the saga’s continue…

My mum bought me tickets to A Candlelight orchestra playing Disney music. Which sounds great and it did. But then it started to get weirder and weirder. So my mum said why she have to ring up the place to find out if it’s a scam or not. As I mentioned, well you have the tickets, and the information. I do not. But I rang anyway…Three times…For it to basically be a scam. Well it sounds like one. So I tell my mum what I found out. It sounds like something to do with Vivaldi is on.

She then proceeds to ignore what I say and say well everyone else is still keen. Are you? When I read this, I remembered how only the weekend before how I had to go to a party that I knew I wasn’t actually invited to the first time.

So then she sends me a screen shot of a reply, saying oh look what they found out! It’s still on. Some weird explanation about how the Vivaldi has been a couple of weeks beforehand, even though the person I actually TALKED too. Said something very different, the Vivaldi thing was on this week and next week. She also said there was a mix up the week before, where people rocked up and nothing was on.

But you know, god forbid SOMEONE LISTENS TOO ME…

I am just over people not listening to anyone.

I think people more and more these days just want to be right and/or liked. Without listening to how they’re actions and words affect others. A lot of people I know were annoyed with me because beforehand I had said how I hate birthdays, because no one listens to you and you end up feeling like shit. People REALLY seem to believe that you can buy people expensive presents, that you can have a good night at somewhere. And it means that all the lead up is gone and buried and forgiven, it REALLY doesn’t! Funnily enough, one of my fellow Taurus friends who was born the day before me, agreed with me.

Let’s see what happened to the lead up to my birthday this year.

I was invited to a party for myself, and three others born in the same week. However, I wasn’t even invited to the first “round”. It was ONLY because everyone said no to the first date, nothing to do with me though. Though the people who invited me the SECOND time, thought it was. The first round’s date was on a long weekend, so no one was here, lol. I was only allowed to invited two friends, which I couldn’t do. Because if I invite that person, than those three have to come. Yet my mum, whose birthday it wasn’t even for, was allowed to invite all her friends. Yet, everyone will insist to me that they would never put this “family” over me. No one said anything to them, no one stood up for me, or point out how weird it was. I didn’t even get a say on the music list.

My partner made me come along to his game, that I have repeatedly told him I feel dumb, I don’t feel comfortable and he’s always telling me what to do…Because I DON’T KNOW HOW TO PLAY THE GAME. That was the weekend before my birthday. The weekend after my birthday, he didn’t show up to the party I was only invited to in the second round.

I didn’t have a good time because of any of them, I had a good time, because of ME. And because I invited my friends anyway, lol.

I don’t know HOW no one whose supposed to be close too me or who I’ve known my whole life, doesn’t know this about me. I am not motivated by money or expensive things. I am motivated by love, kindness and knowing who respects.

Enough about me though…Because it’s not just me this keeps happening too…Maybe it’s why though I can relate to a lot of people.

I am sure by now, for anyone who gets into disagreements and arguments with people, by now, you would have experienced or you would have seen someone say “It’s just my opinion”…Or “Are you saying I can’t have a opinion”. You’ll find most if not all people who say this, the person they’re talking never actually says that they can’t have a opinion. Most, if not all the time, people are pointing out what is actually wrong with their opinion. As an example, recently I had ended just a white man to fuck off with his opinion.

His opinion wasn’t you know “Swiss Cheese in the best cheese”. His “opinion”? That a black woman was lying about how WOC are more likely to die during childbirth, because Doctors don’t take them as seriously. Which has actually been proven before. Same with heart attacks. Not so much racism reasons, but because WOC always have to come across as…and as Michelle Obama says … Better than perfect. I asked this male, when was the last time he was WOC giving birth? Of course he replied with “What are you saying I can’t have a opinion (quote) fucking hypocrite” So I reminded him I didn’t say that, I just asked him about how he was claiming he had “experiences” then. Then told him to fuck off.

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry

Again, why do people trying to tell me what Meghan Markle and HARRY said? I actually listened to what they said. I wont listen to anything Piers Morgan has to say. That “man” has a unhealthy obsession with her, and anyone who doesn’t like him in general. I can always tell when someone has listened to him or the tabloids. Because they always do exactly what Harry and Meghan are saying. Harry and Meghan actually said:

• Nothing bad about the Queen, in fact it was all positive, good and respectful and I suspect Harry may even be her favourite.
• HARRY TOLD Meghan about the “skin tone” question. Also that it was “a” family member. And lets be honest here, we probably all have at least ONE racist family member. I do. Also though, if they had said that about my family, I wouldn’t overreact and try to convince every it isn’t me. Like certain white people are trying say Harry and Meghan are saying. That’s not what they said.
• In fact, neither Meghan or Harry blamed their Family. They blamed the people working around them or “The Institution”.

I think a LOT OF WHITE PEOPLE. Just listened to and heard what they wanted too. What has been funny about that is that I don’t know WHAT the Royal Family or the Institution think they’re doing. But they’re desperate attempts of PR are freaking laughable lately. The tabloids are still doing what they’re always doing. The Royals work for the people…Not the other way round. Sorry, not sorry.

Just a reminder as well. All these white folks be defending “the Institution” which is what they’re defending. This is the SAME INSTITUTION that attacked and harmed Princess Diana as well. So when Harry said “I could see History repeating itself” I HEARD THAT…A lot of people heard that, except for some white people and the tabloids.

White Women Victimhood Package

Seriously, as a white woman, I would really love to know, lol. Is there some sort of white woman, victimhood package. Where a white woman is completely in the wrong, but then she gets to go on this “Victimhood” tour, where she gets to complain how much SHE was hurt. While the people that have been hurt, are ignored?

I’m talking about:

• Suzanne Moore
• Sharon Osbourne
• Kelly Osbourne
• All Trumps Media “advisors”.
• Well, every Trump Government advisor or head of department.
• Amanda Stoker
• Bettina Arndt
• JK Rowling

I know all about free speech, but sometimes I just want to say to these women and some white men too. SHUT UP AND ACTUALLY LISTEN FOR ONCE. Where I hear more about how you are not listening, rather than the people you’re not listening too, it’s actually really embarrassing to me, and I don’t understand how it’s not embarrassing to them? I don’t care that Sharon Osbourne doesn’t understand a WOC point of view, so she got defensive. LISTEN THEN! Shut up and listen. And if you continue not to understand, you most definitely don’t speak over the WOC trying to explain it to you. You will never learn if you’re constantly talking over the people you’re harming.

Just listen white ladies.

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