Shall I tell you a secret?

I am very happy to be getting married later in life.

There just feels like so much less stress. I feel old and strong enough to say “No, that’s not happening”. Like even yesterday my Dad finally went down his usual rabbit hole. Of how it’s my Mums fault, she didn’t tell him that I was getting married. Even though I unblocked him to specifically tell him. Come on dude, you’ve been split from my Mum for 30 years. I’m nearly 40, I literally just do not care anymore.

When I was younger I would have a crying mess.

I reckon 30 these days is a good age to have a kid. Too get married later.

I do not care, you are the parent, I am the child. He started off reasonably okay, with admitting we don’t know each other. Then it turned into the blame game, except it was everyone else’s fault, but his. My mum actually had a go at him this time. My Dad, for some reason used to complain about how my Mum didn’t work, so my Pa, her Dad, helped her to start her own business. THEN my Dad complained about that, how stressful it was for HIM, for her to have a job. Total gaslighting.

My Pa passed away over 10 years ago.

My mum was all “What do you want me too do? Dig him up (he was cremated) and make him apoligise to you”.

You want to feel bad for him, but he made ALL these choices himself.

I was 12 when my parents split, I turn 40 next year. Technically they split two days before I started high school as well. My Dads big idea of getting my Mum back was to tell me that he would kill himself if I didn’t tell her that he loved her. So after that, my older cousin caught me crying on some steps she rang my Dad, he called me a “Drama Queen”.

Guess what’s going to happen tomorrow if he continues.

Sorry about my little sob story. I am perfectly fine. I am just SO emotionally tired. My parents essentially need to grow up.

I just do not care anymore. This time should be about me, but it’s not.

This isn’t where I thought it was going, lol


Monday Magic Thankyous

This is one for more of my religious readers.

I want to say thank you, for being who you are. For embracing the LGB and Trans community. I don’t really actually know many people in my personal life who hate, or are anti-LGBT. I’ve seen a lot of people who call themselves “holy” though, and do hate them. And for women like me. I absolutely hate it.

I hate it when women use women as a shield for their bigotry. It’s so ‘punching down’, like why do they think we’ll take it?

I cant begin to tell you, how it brings people so much relief to hear religious people support any LGBT_ letter. It give me faith again, in faith!lol

Thursday Theories – Being back on Twitter

It’s been really funny back on Twitter. I swear, literally nothing has changed. It’s pretty much the same thing, except for the fact being that the theories are crazy, haha.

I swear, until Rowlings off there, I can’t see much changing. I can see though trans and cis people are getting more tired of the stupidity, and it’s becoming more apparent.

By the way, Drag is not woman face. What’s next cis men complaining that Drag Kings are men face. They are actually comparing it to black face.

Real life though has been crazy this week! I am SO tired, I’ve slept bad every single night, had to work and then my Mum got COVID, her first time. But I was with her when she tested positive! So my partner made me stay with her, which I can’t blame him for.

I am really stressed about getting my wisdom teeth out. I have to go “under” and I have never done that before! I was going to ring up about some questions I had, but I left all my dental information at my partners =/

Then I got so excited about Alex Kingston aka River Song coming to my state, that I went and bought a ticket, but now I am realised I really can’t afford it. So, I’ll have to get a refund, she’ll be around again though, and maybe I can travel interstate and have a whole trip away =D

And Suella Braverman is GONE!!! YAY!!!

Never mind me, I’m just twittering away, lol

If you’re not okay, hug a teddy <3

I have rewritten this post about 3 times now, lol. That is okay. Stuff is happening and things change.

It’s weird to think we have now entered a world without Queen Elizabeth the II in it. It just really is, lol.

On top of which, if you’re not feeling great. How about out some vulnerable people, who do a lot of good work for the LGBT community!

Appeal “LGB Alliance’s” charity status

by Good Law Project

Everyone should have a teddy bear to hug, it’s just so happens, that I have one or two … lol Clearly I have more, lol

I have a … couple, lol


Right, so I am already bored with being stick inside. I only go outside, with a mask on to feed the birds, and out bed washing.

It really is quiet frustrating, because I was going to spend the past weekend:

*Popping to the Library

*Picking up my click and collect presents for my Mum’s birthday presents.

*Picking up new work pants, which I really need.

*And I was getting so much leave at work too. I need to take a couple of days off around Christmas week.

What I’ve been doing this week:


*Catching up on my reading.

*Add to my book collection, via the Kobo. As if I don’t have enough to read already, lol.

*Catching up on some journal and diary writing.

*I have seen some series that I am looking into now. Have you all seen the Windsor’s?

*The house is now properly disinfected.

*Signing into LinkedIn, after months away and seeing that my ex-best friend looked at my profile three days prior!Hahahahaha…

*And the ideas! Ideas on how to improve the house, the garden. Even ideas about doing work from home. Unfortunately, I am not allowed to work from home. Since we deal with a lot of privacy details.

Little Updates

Just some general updates about me and what’s going on. I am advertising myself, hehe

My Discord Channel, is going really well. It’s not exploding, but it is going =D

I am getting more interactions with my Goodreads profile. It’s been great! It is great to interact with other readers. If you love to read, seriously consider it.

I am also SO close to becoming affiliate on Twitch. It’s quiet exciting, it’s like every time I stream that could be the one. It is quiet exciting!

I am still doing the online role playing, it’s been kind of up and down. I have a partner, who I adore and love very much. And it seems a lot want to sleep with other players. Which is fine for them, but it means when I try to interact, it’s pretty much all sex, sex, sex. So I’ve been trying to get my character out more into the world, not looking for conflict. But something else to do, lol.

I am slowly moving in with my partner. We had a big talk, and I think that we’ve come to an agreement. I wanted to wait until after the elections, but his area is a safe area for the Right. Although, it NEARLY wasn’t that way this time, which was cool.

Which means, I am starting to make a house into a home =D

Happy Birthday Shakespeare

Happy Birthday to the world’s best selling author! William Shakespeare!

William Shakespeare – Wikipedia

My favourite quote of ALL things Shakespeare is:

This above all: to thine own self be true, 

What is yours?

I never really got into Romeo and Juliet, funnily enough. My favourite Shakespeare play is “A Midsummer Night’s Dream

The most recent thing that I have learnt though. You can absolutely love Shakespeare, you can love his writings, his plays, his quotes. But don’t ever feel like you HAVE to sit down and watching a play. I recently read a really good “what not to do list”. One of them was, if you don’t want to see a Shakespeare, don’t. I was so happy to read that! I love watching my favourite actors and actresses do Shakespeare monologues. I have yet to see a whole Shakespeare play though.

Also, you HAVE to watch David Mitchells comedy show based on Shakespeare life. Upstart Crow

Bucket List…Video Style

So about a week or so ago, I saw the first video below and thought “I want that to happen to me”. Then I started to shift through some more videos, and found even MORE things I want to happen to/with me before I die.

I present to you all my “bucket list”, but in videos!

bucket list

Learn to pronounce



  1. a number of experiences or achievements that a person hopes to have or accomplish during their lifetime.”making this trip is the first thing on my bucket list”

Look at those eyes!

I want to pet a baby highland scot cow sooooooooooooooo bad! lol

Play with a baby ellie!

Okay, these may be all animal related, lol

The next Tolkien prehaps!

I don’t have many things I want to cross off, but all would be satisfying.

Thursday Theories – Lifestyle

That’s it! Change of lifestyle impending.

I hit my head, and then three nights later I threw up a few times. Do I think the two things are related? No, does my hypochondria … absolutely freaking! Anyway, it’s given me a big wake up call. Especially when I had to ring in sick for work and I started to cry. Because, I really enjoy where I work and I really adore the people I work.

I just have to accept the fact that I cannot eat the same way I did, I cant wait till 8:30pm and stuff my face with bad food.

I have to get more physically active. I have to just generally get out more. Before COVID I used to have no problem with going out, just window shopping and then have some lunch. Talk a walk to the Library and get a couple of books, now I either I don’t have the time or I don’t feel like it.

Where does one even start, I feel like sometimes, “fake it until you make it”. I just don’t feel like this that time, I am one of those, I need to do it all. Give it all! My mum said though, don’t go the complete opposite way. Don’t go from stuffing my face, to you know, eating like once a day.

So! When one changes lifestyle, you have to look at everything:

Eating habits,

Sleeping habits,

Drinking habits,

Mental and physical habits:

What it’s like…

Just listening in on a conversation between my mum and my Gran (with the dementia). It was funny and heartbreaking. My grandparents split up and got divorced in the early 90’s, and yet the way she talks about him, it’s almost like he’s only just passed away and they were together that whole time. Yet, she doesn’t talk much about Reiki, and when she does, we can’t believe she doesn’t remember that’s why they split in the end, lol.

It is an odd thing to really witness, like you always hear about how people forget things and people. You kind of expect that to happen, but you don’t expect them to lose huge chunks of their life, just kind of like that. It’s sad, it’s funny, it’s…different to what you expect. She did amazing things with her Reiki and Tarot work, it took her around the world all on her own! Now it’s all kind of just gone. I guess, I take up that lantern?

Have any of you ever experienced anything different to what you expected?

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