Before you read this, a lot of posts this week were written with last week in mind. Since it was World Kindness Day, last week. I wanted to keep my posts as kind as possible.
“…surrounded by enemies and spies catching and perverting every word that falls from my lips or flows from my pen, and inventing where facts fail them.” -Thomas Jefferson’s reflections on Washington, D.C. in a letter to his daughter Martha. Some things never change, dad!
The scariest part of this tweet. Ivanka’s clear lack of American History. She’s speaking with world leaders, and clearly has NO idea who Thomas Jefferson is and what he did. Yet, Trump Supporters went her to continue her fathers “legacy”. I’m Australian. I know this was written when Jefferson was being accused of bearing children…Which, he did, with Sally Hemings a slave. In terms of someone protesting their innocence, when they in fact, did it…Yeah, I suppose some things never change, do they?
It is frightening how often Ivanka just uses quotes, with clearly no understanding of their context. It’s like she just Googles something and goes “Oh that fits my narrative” but doesn’t actually do any research.
So tonight I had a bit of a freak out and a bit of a wobble. Currently here in South Australia we are experiencing a major devastating bush fire, people lives are being lost, homes and property completely gone and we unfortunately had one well known kennel and cattery burnt down with many of the dogs and all of the cats still on the property.
Anyways this same night I had a date with the number one guy (there is no number two guy anymore). I heard that the suburbs that three different ex’s of mine are from, were required to evacuate. I couldn’t help myself, I got worried and I realised that I still cared. Not in love care, but worry something will go wrong kind of caring. Then I got angry at myself for caring at all. My mum told me it was perfectly naturally to still care and worry while not being in love with that person.
I hate though that I still care about these people who obviously never cared about me. I highly doubt that if they heard that I had to be evacuated that they would worry about me at all. I got so upset that I still care and I know that they don’t and now I’m frightened that it’ll happen to me all over again.
I can already tell it’s happening, everything that the number one guy did tonight bugged the crap out of me and yet I know in the back of my head none of it’s any of his fault, so I managed to fake a “sickie” and get myself out of the date earlier than anticipated and then collapsed in tears when I got home. 30 years of being treated like hell and I think that I broke tonight. I can feel myself cutting off and becoming cold.
p.s. I will be fine, I just can’t seem to stop crying tonight.