Dreamers

Dreaming of far off places,

Magic spells, Freedom and Fun,

Still warm in good thoughts,

Wrapping myself up in fun times and happy thinking.

Every morning is hell to wake up too,

As all dreamers do,

The morning time is just more nightmares,

The happy images running through my head.

A big sigh escapes from my mouth, another morning, another day…Time to get up again, no more dreams…For now…

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Random Thoughts…

I am at a school and I am in a prime spot in the Library to watch all the cars and people outside go by and since here it’s the beginning of Spring, you can probably guess that I am not actually doing any of the school work that I came in too do. Instead here I am, thinking about you…

I can’t help it I let my mind drift off and think about you and what you might be doing right now. It’s such a gorgeous day and I’m sitting here wondering if you’ve finished work yet, are you even at work, or are you wrapped up lying on some grass having a picnic somewhere with some another girl. I can’t forgive for how you’ve treated me after everything, but I can’t stop thinking about you either. About everything that could and probably would have been…and how we would have never have wasted a day like today.

I don’t want you back and yet I miss so incredibly much that it still saddens my every waking moment and although the nightmares have seemed to have stopped. I still have that 5 minutes before I fall asleep where I still think of you and everything that we could have been. I miss you with every beat of my heart and yet there’s just no way that I could tell you or let you back into my life.

I look really pretty today, I can tell by the way the guys are staring at me, but I hate it when they do it…Don’t they know I’m yours? Oh wait…No, I’m not. Well the sun seems to be going down and it’s getting darker, so I guess that I should thinking about you and my thoughts become as dark as the evening that is coming.

I miss you ❤

Super Girlfriend Mode…

on-off

So this weekend is a big test for me! It’s the first “supportive” thing I will be doing as my new ‘beau’s’ partner. I am nervous for a few various reasons:

  • Posisbly will meet some members of his Family
  • Will be meeting his friends for the first time.
  • Will be in the same room as the friends who I do not like (and they don’t like me) and who I have not seen for a couple of months.

It’s a long story (as they always are) there are so many reason to feel uncomfortable and my mind is screaming “Don’t Go!!! Don’t do it!!!”.  No! Super Girlfriend Mode is on and I will be dragging (and a couple of other friends) myself out. I think it’s one of the main things I will miss about being single, if I don’t want to go somewhere…I don’t have too. I could avoid meeting people for the first time for the rest of my life! I don’t owe anyone an explanation as to why I wouldn’t want to go somewhere, I just wouldn’t go.

Hang onto your single life people!!!

(*Edit….

Will be meeting his parents (at least)
Will be surrounded by his friends who apparently dislike me (but no one, including them, will tell me why)
All the people who were suppose to be coming with me, have now pulled out.)

If I can get through tonight’s social situations, I can get through anything!