So since next week I will be changing to full-time, in a job I really don’t like (think about the money, think about the money) In order to cheer myself up, I enjoy YouTube videos of the fantasy sexy/celebrity men I enjoy. I even have a whole YouTube playlist full of these men … Okay before I sound even more like a sad young lady. What do you do to cheer yourself up and make a stressful situation as easy as possible?
The last thing before I go to bed and to calm myself is you, your voice. Your beautiful singing voice…Yargh, why is it you that can calm me down before I go into something that scares me? I picked the wrong brother…Again =/ Why did I have to discover your beautiful songs before bed tonight?
We’ve all had one, haven’t we? That person that we want, that person we can’t have, the one that we can never have? You’re not in love with them and you’re not planning or are going to cheat on your current partner, but you can’t help but think about them. What would it be like to be with them, just one night with them? Even when you’re single and you still can’t have them, you want them, they’re the one you think of during the night, the one that “helps” you to get over your heart break.
I feel really terrible, with my fantasy guy, I could never have him. But I really want him, even for just one night. Even when we were both single and even before I met the guy I’m with now, I can’t have him and I really wanted him. You see, I woke up to hear him singing one morning and I don’t think he knew that I was there. He has the most beautiful voice I have ever heard and he plays the guitar…but I was lying there, completely falling for his voice, and at the same time I was lying right next to my partner, at the time.
I had laid there so still, as to not wake up my (now ex) partner and I just listened to this amazinginly beautiful voice signing one of my favourite songs of all time and strumming his guitar. Soak through the thin walls and into my mind and I haven’t been able to shake it out of their since. He’s been the one that I sing about in the shower, he’s the one that I think about in the darkness of the night and this will be the only time I ever tell about it to another soul.
There is nothing worse than a fantasy lover that you can never have.
The one who makes you feel like this… (the song that inspired me to write this post)