Family doesn’t always have to mean blood ❤ Yeah, it’s great when your whole family is not toxic, but life is not always like that. Families are supposed to help each other through life and succeed at it, survive it. Not make it harder. What’s the point of having a “family” where they make you dread, every day, the thing you should thrive at?
I have actually debated posting this one several times, because it such a sensitive topic. I have noticed though that there is a certain type of “parent” though and they seem to be getting worse. I don’t know if it’s just a generation thing, or a hereditary thing or just a lack of discipline thing. It might even be that these days people feel more okay with sharing their parenting on social media.
This isn’t a blog about the parents who’ve had enough, with their…usually…ex-partners. Now I just want to state as well, this comes from a person of a broken home…and although I love my Dad…He can be pretty disrespectful, while at the same time demanding respect. This is a plea from a child who is consistently now watching others go through what she went through. I have noticed a trend though:
- They tend to never show up when they’re supposed to.
- They think “spending time” with their kids is a couple of hours here and there.
- They get angry and act like it’s an inconvenience if they HAVE or NEED to take care of their own children.
- Funnily enough get really angry if their children decide they don’t want to spend time with them. Bad reflection on them I suppose.
- They can’t understand (especially later in life) why they don’t have a good relationship with their children.
- …And them blame their children for the bad relationships.
- It’s always about “them”.
- They usually have at least one failed relationship.
- They tend to think they are “baby sitting” their own children…You are not, you are raising them.
- They brag to the other parent how the children don’t misbehave with them…Never occurring to them, the kids don’t want to mess up because they want to treasure the little time YOU spend with them.
- They usually think every else thinks they are a wonderful parent.
- They think no one else has noticed how much they have failed as a parent.
- It’s usually very rare that pay any child support and even if they eventually do, they question all the other parents spending…The one that is actually RAISING their children.
- They think no one else has noticed how much they have failed as a parent.
- THEY THINK NO ONE ELSE HAD NOTICED HOW MUCH THEY HAVE FAILED AS A PARENT…EVERYONE KNOW! ESPECIALLY YOUR CHILDREN! They have! I 100% guarantee!
Sounds like anyone you know?
This is my plea to *those* parents.
The funny thing is I think they genuinely want a good relationship with their children. They are just usually have too much of an ego and are just generally lazy in their overall life.
Any relationship in your life IS work. You actually have to make an effort with anyone in your life, especially if you want a good relationship. You have to compromise no matter if you have a good relationship with your children, there are times when they are going to be bad or downright disrespectful. Usually when they “act up” they are actually asking for help, they just don’t want to seem “weak”.
Make this the year you make an effort to have a good relationship with your children.
What do you consider is the most perfect food for you? (It can be your favorite food to something extremely healthy.)
Lasagna…It’s literally saved my life. There was one point in my life were it was the only thing I could stomach, and it helped me gain weight back after losing so much. I got down to 95 pounds or 43 kilograms, so you can imagine how good lasagna was for me!lol
Are you focused on today or tomorrow?
I am pretty much a person who is focused on today. My partner and I actually have this joke where we say “Oh that’s future Lauren’s problem”. We’re both bad procrastinators, so that’s probably a reason why we take things day by day as well. Sometimes though you can’t worry about tomorrow, because there’s still not much that you can control.
If you could interview one of your great-great-great grandparents, who would it be (if you know their name) and what would you ask?
Too be honest I would love to interview any of them, they probably know even more of where my family line leads. I wouldn’t know where to begin!
What inspired you or what did you appreciate this past week? Feel free to use a quote, a photo, a story, or even a combination.
My dog has not been her usually sparkly self. She’s about 11 years old and she had to have some teeth taken out recently, it’s probably her biggest “operation” she had and she seemed to be recovering well. However it’s been about two weeks since she had it and she’s eating and everything, but just not 100%. It’s made me realise how much I love her and how much she’s done for me without her ever knowing! It was funny in a way because the same morning where both my Mum and I became concerned, when we came back from work she just seemed naturally herself again.
On the same day though one of my Mum’s work colleagues said that her dogs were acting the same. They were eating, but they just didn’t seem 100% percent. So maybe it’s just the changing weather or something? We’re heading towards Spring here and so far we keep having four seasons in one day, each day. It’s knocking us humans about, so why wouldn’t it for the animals?
4. A Family Member
Well after last weeks Grateful Challenge about our families it really did make me feel how lucky I am to have my family. Even when I mess up, my family never make me feel badly about it. I know that I can talk to them about what happened and how I can improve, but I never feel spoken down to, which is why I keep going back.
So it marks it hard to think of just one family member I have that I am more grateful more than the rest, but I guess I don’t have to take it that way…So I wont. I am grateful for my entire family, even the ones I don’t particularly agree with their views. As they were the first people that taught me about you don’t have to agree with everything just because you might care about someone.
However, when I thought about the first thing that popped into my mine is I do have a special relationship with my Grandmother and throughout my life she had probably been the biggest supporter of her entire family. She is a such strong individual and she has had a really amazing life. She was the one who taught me about Reiki and she was the one who eventually “levelled” me up through Reiki teachings. As well as teaching me about the Chakra, Tarot…A lot of my spiritual side comes from her, as well a lot of my general overall history and background, I’ve learnt from her. The best thing I find about her is that she is just so assertive. Which is something that I severely lack, but with all my faults, she never makes you feel bad about them. She just naturally accepts that’s who you are…And it’s fantastic to have someone like that.
I honestly believe she is the reason that while I have a big heart, I refuse to let it be taken advantage of. Or allow others to make me feel bad about myself. Whenever I need to “Re-tune” my self, she’s the one I would always go to first. I love my Mum and she does give me great advice, but she’s my Mum,lol
I really do appreciate both sides of my family but for two very different reasons. My mums side are incredibly close, sometimes I actually would prefer to hang out with them then some of my “friends”. As I’ve gotten older, I will chose to hang out with my family over friends. We are all so different as well and yet, we just gel. We have in our little mix, gay, really religious,sporty, geeky, new age, all science. Yet, we don’t fight, we accept each other differences and I guess that’s whats makes it so easy to be around them.
On my Dad’s side they barley all speak to one another and it is just incredibly sad. It also constantly reminds me that time is precious and you shouldn’t take those you are close too for granted. They’ve also taught me that sometimes it’s not always your blood family that makes a family. It’s kind of a weird way to be grateful for a bunch of your family that don’t speak to each other, but I am. I am very grateful that I have two families that are totally different in their approaches to life.
One side of my family are really active and just want to do a lot. There the type that can’t just relax on a holiday, they have to get up at 5am and have to do things. Whereas the other side have no problem sleeping in, just lying around a pool, and there isn’t anything wrong with that either. One side of my family are incredibly active and live life to the fullest, doing everything, whereas the other side has huge problems with addiction. I know it probably sounds weird, but I am grateful for being able to see all sorts of life. It’s been able to give me the ability to understand that EVERYONE on this planet has their own story that their living. No two families are exactly alike and if families are so different, why wouldn’t the rest of the world be?
“I read comic books”
As a general rule now I skim by a lot of the articles and twitter feeds that are on Facebook these days, because people are just dumb…and they get so comfortable and feel so righteous about everything, it is like people genuinely believe “Well that’s my opinion, so I’m right” and if anyone dares disagree or makes a good point, they should just “shut their traps”. No one wants to discuss things any-more, everyone just wants to be ‘right’.
That quote is what started my rant today. I was looking through some of the posts on Facebook about families who cosplay together and this made me smile, until I got to a picture of a mother and her two daughters dressed pretty much like Michelle Pfieffer “Catwoman”. One guy decided to write that he thought it was wrong to dress the little girls like “tramps”. A whole bunch of women (which lets be honest, is rare) started to defend the mother and her choice and saw nothing wrong with the outfits. I wasn’t going to say anything until I saw this guy write about how these ladies should “shut their traps” and how he “read comics” so we couldn’t argue with him?
This guy is the exact example of why I, and a lot of my female friends, will NOT date nerds and geeks! As a general rule they are the worst, every nerd and geek that I have dated has treated me horribly. A great example of this is when I got out of an abusive relationships within a particularly nerdy group where I got bullied and hit by my ex-partners room-mate. As sometimes happens I had a one night stand with a guy (after we broke up)…Fast forward a week later I wake up to be publicly humiliated on Facebook by a group of guys “slut-shaming” me because how dare I have a one night stand and not date their “good guy” friend instead. God knows I want to get back into a group who think publicly humiliating a girl over something that isn’t any of their business and thinks that this is a really good idea to get their own way.
Funnily enough I don’t have anything to do with those guys any-more. Yet they still insist that they are a bunch of “good guys”. GOOD GUYS do NOT publicly humiliate people over things that are NONE of their business. A good guy would have gone and asked me why I had the one night, since I had never one before and it was completely out of character for me. I’ve seen a bunch of them who are over 30 humiliate a bunch of teenagers on Facebook because the teenagers didn’t agree with them.
Now I know that not all “nerds and geeks” are like this, but it seems to me the one that’s are completely into whatever their genre is in the gaming world, they seem to be the worse. If they have other interests or other friendship groups outside of the gaming world, they seem to be a lot better. A great example of this is the guy who all the other guys wanted me to date, by humiliating me. The actual guy started a hairdressing course and is friends with really lovely girls, he has since apologised and we are great friends. However, the guys who actually humiliated me are all still doing the same things and still acting and reacting in the same way. Literally nothing has changed.
(Okay this was posted on Tuesday instead of actually Monday…Please forgive me!)
I went on a family reunion this weekend and it was amazing! We stayed at a renovated train station/platform building, that still has trains running by it (so much fun at 2 in the morning ~.~)
It was amazing because my family is amazing. All the way up to the reunion people kept telling me that I must be dreading it but I didn’t and I never would! It was really sad to hear how people just do not get along with their families. We are all so different, but we get along so well and I am very aware of how lucky I am that we all get along so well and how much we love each other.
These are just a few snapshots of the trip =)