In my mid-long life, I have learnt

You can’t tell the people you know, anything, haha.

No matter who much someone you know may be surrounded by others, who know what they’re talking about. No matter how much someone you know may see those around talk about their experiences, about how real something is. No matter who many people someone you know may lose from their lives, because of their “No, not listening”. Some people just will not listen, will they?

I’m not just talking about when someone asks you for advice, and then they don’t take it. I think everyone does that. Although, depending on who it is, you might do. I’m also talking about how smart people around you, might be talking about how real COVID is, or something like that. Yet, someone you know, will take a picture of a leaflet they got in the mail saying how “fake” COVID is.

Not that I’m looking at anyone in my family in particular about that.

You know what I mean? Especially when you are Facebook “friends” with people who have actually had COVID. It’s just weird, lol

LISTEN!!! When did that stop???

*Long Rant Post Incoming. I have lot to say about people who do not listen anymore*

In all honesty, this is probably the only place I actually feel listened to anymore. So you know that post about how I hate birthdays? Well the saga’s continue…

My mum bought me tickets to A Candlelight orchestra playing Disney music. Which sounds great and it did. But then it started to get weirder and weirder. So my mum said why she have to ring up the place to find out if it’s a scam or not. As I mentioned, well you have the tickets, and the information. I do not. But I rang anyway…Three times…For it to basically be a scam. Well it sounds like one. So I tell my mum what I found out. It sounds like something to do with Vivaldi is on.

She then proceeds to ignore what I say and say well everyone else is still keen. Are you? When I read this, I remembered how only the weekend before how I had to go to a party that I knew I wasn’t actually invited to the first time.

So then she sends me a screen shot of a reply, saying oh look what they found out! It’s still on. Some weird explanation about how the Vivaldi has been a couple of weeks beforehand, even though the person I actually TALKED too. Said something very different, the Vivaldi thing was on this week and next week. She also said there was a mix up the week before, where people rocked up and nothing was on.

But you know, god forbid SOMEONE LISTENS TOO ME…

I am just over people not listening to anyone.

I think people more and more these days just want to be right and/or liked. Without listening to how they’re actions and words affect others. A lot of people I know were annoyed with me because beforehand I had said how I hate birthdays, because no one listens to you and you end up feeling like shit. People REALLY seem to believe that you can buy people expensive presents, that you can have a good night at somewhere. And it means that all the lead up is gone and buried and forgiven, it REALLY doesn’t! Funnily enough, one of my fellow Taurus friends who was born the day before me, agreed with me.

Let’s see what happened to the lead up to my birthday this year.

I was invited to a party for myself, and three others born in the same week. However, I wasn’t even invited to the first “round”. It was ONLY because everyone said no to the first date, nothing to do with me though. Though the people who invited me the SECOND time, thought it was. The first round’s date was on a long weekend, so no one was here, lol. I was only allowed to invited two friends, which I couldn’t do. Because if I invite that person, than those three have to come. Yet my mum, whose birthday it wasn’t even for, was allowed to invite all her friends. Yet, everyone will insist to me that they would never put this “family” over me. No one said anything to them, no one stood up for me, or point out how weird it was. I didn’t even get a say on the music list.

My partner made me come along to his game, that I have repeatedly told him I feel dumb, I don’t feel comfortable and he’s always telling me what to do…Because I DON’T KNOW HOW TO PLAY THE GAME. That was the weekend before my birthday. The weekend after my birthday, he didn’t show up to the party I was only invited to in the second round.

I didn’t have a good time because of any of them, I had a good time, because of ME. And because I invited my friends anyway, lol.

I don’t know HOW no one whose supposed to be close too me or who I’ve known my whole life, doesn’t know this about me. I am not motivated by money or expensive things. I am motivated by love, kindness and knowing who respects.

Enough about me though…Because it’s not just me this keeps happening too…Maybe it’s why though I can relate to a lot of people.

I am sure by now, for anyone who gets into disagreements and arguments with people, by now, you would have experienced or you would have seen someone say “It’s just my opinion”…Or “Are you saying I can’t have a opinion”. You’ll find most if not all people who say this, the person they’re talking never actually says that they can’t have a opinion. Most, if not all the time, people are pointing out what is actually wrong with their opinion. As an example, recently I had ended just a white man to fuck off with his opinion.

His opinion wasn’t you know “Swiss Cheese in the best cheese”. His “opinion”? That a black woman was lying about how WOC are more likely to die during childbirth, because Doctors don’t take them as seriously. Which has actually been proven before. Same with heart attacks. Not so much racism reasons, but because WOC always have to come across as…and as Michelle Obama says … Better than perfect. I asked this male, when was the last time he was WOC giving birth? Of course he replied with “What are you saying I can’t have a opinion (quote) fucking hypocrite” So I reminded him I didn’t say that, I just asked him about how he was claiming he had “experiences” then. Then told him to fuck off.

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry

Again, why do people trying to tell me what Meghan Markle and HARRY said? I actually listened to what they said. I wont listen to anything Piers Morgan has to say. That “man” has a unhealthy obsession with her, and anyone who doesn’t like him in general. I can always tell when someone has listened to him or the tabloids. Because they always do exactly what Harry and Meghan are saying. Harry and Meghan actually said:

  • Nothing bad about the Queen, in fact it was all positive, good and respectful and I suspect Harry may even be her favourite.
  • HARRY TOLD Meghan about the “skin tone” question. Also that it was “a” family member. And lets be honest here, we probably all have at least ONE racist family member. I do. Also though, if they had said that about my family, I wouldn’t overreact and try to convince every it isn’t me. Like certain white people are trying say Harry and Meghan are saying. That’s not what they said.
  • In fact, neither Meghan or Harry blamed their Family. They blamed the people working around them or “The Institution”.

I think a LOT OF WHITE PEOPLE. Just listened to and heard what they wanted too. What has been funny about that is that I don’t know WHAT the Royal Family or the Institution think they’re doing. But they’re desperate attempts of PR are freaking laughable lately. The tabloids are still doing what they’re always doing. The Royals work for the people…Not the other way round. Sorry, not sorry.

Just a reminder as well. All these white folks be defending “the Institution” which is what they’re defending. This is the SAME INSTITUTION that attacked and harmed Princess Diana as well. So when Harry said “I could see History repeating itself” I HEARD THAT…A lot of people heard that, except for some white people and the tabloids.

One-sided conversations

I think the thing that always frustrates me about bigots and their bigotry. Notice how they always say how they’re doing it for the ‘good’ of other people. Yet, I have to yet see anyone ask them to do “it”. TERFs are a really bad at doing this. They’ll talk about complete strangers genitalia how they’re trying to stop young women from cutting off their healthy breasts. Meaning they’re trying to stop females from becoming men…Yet, no one asked them to do this.

Bigots will usually feign concern, and saying they’re JUST “trying to help” “trying to protect” When no ones asking them too.

Here is my one sided conversation. March the 31st IS Trans Visibility Day. So, now I would like to change the conversation, to make this post a positive post instead =D

Wanted to start the lead to #TransDayOfVisibility with a article from @PinkNews When the MAJORITY of female athletes are saying positive things for trans youth in sports, maybe it IS transphobia. Then again that’d mean people would be LISTENING to women though.

While, technically I wont be able to watch this. It’ll be 4 in the morning for me, I’m sure a lot of you can. Katy is utterly lovely. So while I am sure the subject will be heavy, I am sure it will be talked about in a sensitive manner.

A Guide on how to educate yourself about transgender issues – Life Hacker

Social Media and it’s weirdness.

I’ve said it once and I’ve said it a million times. We know have these tools to communicate (and for free) and yet, we communicate less than we ever have before.

So why do people never use it? I was discussing with a friend the other day, how said it is, that the only people who seem to communicate with you. Are the bullies, are the bigots.

Friends and Family, always seem like the last people who want to communicate with you. I recently realised that I had been unfriended by a “friend” on Facebook, but she hadn’t on either of my Insta accounts. In fact, she was still made comments on some of my posts, on Insta. Yet, I couldn’t begin to tell what I had done. It’s the most bizaree thing I’ve experienced, because I’ve just been chatting to her, like nothing was wrong.

I actually thought that we got on really well. So I was a bit perplexed, still am to be honest.

This is what happens though, when you don’t communicate.

What people who do not talk to me, and communicate is. I literally do not care anymore, if you chose to unfriend me. I learnt three years ago, to no longer waste my time anymore on people who just make life more difficult, even if it is passive aggressively. What I always learnt three years ago, was that I am not a bad person. No matter how much my ex best friend may have called me that. So if you have a problem with me, it’s more than likely something I have done unintentionally. So if you have a problem with me, that you just have to unfriend me, or when I try to reach out and you still say nothing. It’s gonna stay your problem.

Obligations

I don’t know if men experience this too, but I am sure the ladies know what I’m talking about.

There’s always that one person, usually one of the opposite sex, who every single time you sign onto a social media platform, that also had DM’s or you can privately chat.

They’re there “Where are you” “What are you up too” “Can we chat” “Why wont you chat with me”.

It is REALLY annoying! And also really puts me off wanting to go on, which I guess, isn’t totally bad.

People, we don’t have to chat to these … I don’t know what to call them … Obligations

You should never ever be obligated in a friendship to chat just whenever they want. You are under no obligation to chat with someone when you don’t want to. I actually was a little shocked the other day when I post a message to someone, something that I thought they’d like. And they did say “thank you” But then ended it with “I thought you had forgotten about me”.

Like, come on. If you want to chat, see that message I sent you? You send one back through that. Communication is a two way street.

Posting a post on FB, Twitter, Insta … doesn’t automatically = I want a chat. If you want one though, ask.

Didn’t say that…

Has anyone else noticed that the Right keep saying things that the Liberals say things that, Liberals are not saying. The only “people” saying it are the Right?

  • People like Candace Owen say that Liberals keep calling George Floyd a “Hero”. No Liberal has ever called Floyd a hero. We say he’s innocent, not a hero though. Is CO saying that only heroes’ get murdered?
  • According to the Right we keep saying that you can’t be proud of who you are. We have never said this either. We say you can be totally proud of who are…but why are you proud to be white specifically? I’m white, I’m proud of who I am. Nothing to do with the colour of my skin though. Yes, black people can have Black Pride. No, we cannot have “white pride” because there’s nothing white, to be proud of. What do we have to be proud of? The KKK, Nazi’s, slavery, oppression. How many white men have you seen say we should be happy that they gave women the right to vote. Who was stopping women to vote in the first place?lol. And they STILL want to take our body choices away from us, too this day. Invading countries, nearly wiping out the entire indigenous population. just to tell people of colour, that they’re not allowed in “our” country. You know the country we invaded, and nearly wiped out the indigenous populations. How dare countries we invade think they have any rights to live in “ours”.
  • https://www.facebook.com/IamSouthAfrican/videos/840977289283837/

Share Your World – 09/06/2020

Share Your World – 06/09/2020

Share Your World

Questions:

How comfortable are you speaking in front of large groups of people?

Considering that I’m an introvert,you’d think that I would be terrified! However, if I know why I’m talking to a group, then I am normally fine. It’s the chat chit afterwards I normally struggle with afterwards.

What would be the best thing you could reasonably expect to find in a cave?

Something really usual and unique. Or food, if I’m lost,lol.

What did you think was going to be amazing but turned out to be horrible?

I thought that working in a Library would be brilliant, but I have just had so many bad experiences. Most of the workers are nice, but it always management that’s problem. I think that the workers aren’t management, for that reason. Workers actually get it, management never do. Even in a Library!

The first time I worked in a Library, they knew I didn’t have a licence. But I still got all the really bad shifts, every single Sunday. When buses took forever to come by. I’d have to leave at 11am, to make sure I’d get there by 1. Ones that went for only three hours, finishing really late at night, in the middle of winter. Then, I worked one weekend about 4 months later with another casual who started with me. She had not worked any weekends, or any of the late shifts. So I started saying no, because I had assumed all the others were saying no, they weren’t even being asked. Then I got a sick, and even though I kept them up to date with my progress, I lost my contract…But no one actually told me that. So when my Doctor said that I was ready to go back to work, I told them…For the next month and a half, nothing. I heard nothing. One of the reasons, I didn’t panic was because it was Christmas time, so I thought that one)all the shifts will be full. Two)It’s Christmas, whose going to give up money unless it’s really important. Third) Surely if I had lost my contract someone would tell me. When FINALLY someone got back to me…They blamed me -.- They had tried my phone apparently, but I must have been really busy. Considering that 95% of our conversations took place over email. I call bull. I didn’t even thank anyone for giving me the experience.

So yeah, that was my first library job. Not the greatest of starts.

Actually I have never been treated well with Libraries, only as a customer. Even when I volunteered, I left there pretty angry as well.

What’s the silliest thing you’ve observed someone get upset about?

I don’t get the whole flying the Confederate flags as patriotic. Then getting upset when people want to get rid of the Confederate flags. They are literal losers, they lost the fight to have slaves. So why the upset about getting rid of statues and flags of literal horrible people.


Gratitude: 

Please feel free to share something that gave you an uplifted spirit during this past week.  (Optional)

gratitudechanges

Communication

I do think it’s fantastic that people are so willingly to talk about mental health issues and the mental health awareness type days. I know I also talk/write a lot about having all these communication tools, but no one ever using them. So I do realise how this might all sound a tad hypocritical.

As someone who suffers from anxiety, one of the drawbacks of having anxiety. Is that if you get an overload of information, it’s exactly that, an overload.

Star Trek No No No GIF by arielle-m - Find & Share on GIPHY

So when you have one week that has mental health awareness day, and then the next day r u okay and then the next suicide prevention day. It can get overwhelming. Other things that can be a drawback with anxiety is to become a bit of a hypochondriac. So when you get constantly see ads and people constantly asking you “Are you okay”.

You know when someone asks “Are you mad? Are you mad? Are you mad?” and you weren’t before, then you are…It’s like that,lol.

Share Your World 17-19-19

Share Your World

Share Your World 9-16-19

QUESTIONS:

Courtesy of Rory:

Are we losing the art of listening in comparison to simply hearing?

I do believe that most definitely that is true. I have to say I think I’m one of them. It can depend on how I’m feeling as well, if I’m trying to get myself out of an anxiety attack. I may not listen as much, if I don’t really like the person. If it’s a situation, you know where someone just complains and does nothing about their situation? My mum complains a lot about her work, but has never applied for another job and only really says anything to me about it all. A lot of her mangers seems to be borderline treating their employees illegal. Their managers customer service is atrocious as well! People only like talking to my mum and she’s the receptionist, so there’s only so much she can do herself. Even saying that my Mum is still a good listener, hence why people keep wanting to talk to just her.

How often do you openly discuss with friends or here in WP with your readership topics that make you feel uncomfortable or may be taboo or stigma laden?

Not too many people know about my WordPress, my partner does and possibly others do. I actually just had a “real life” friend post a screen shot saying the link to my blog wasn’t working. So people do know about it, but I don’t talk about it. Unless they bring it up of course.

Do you think that these discussions should be freely discussed and written about more?

Too a point, sometimes constantly talking about something can bring you down. But you need to get the awareness out there as well.

Did you have a nickname as a child and if so, what was [or what is it now]?

I used to get called Smiley a lot when I was kid, I always apparently smiled…a lot. The only time I used to cry was when I put in restraints. Who can blame me though! So my baby play pen and when I got older, I hated being in a seat belt. I still do really,lol.

Why is there still ‘stuff’ we simply just don’t understand despite our progressive world?

I don’t think we’re always supposed to understand everything. Otherwise would we be here?


Would you rather double your height or lose half your weight?  (In response to last week’s double your weight, half your height query).  Thanks Leslie!  Suggestion by Leslie – Swot8

I think double my height, I don’t think it’d hurt to be taller. If I lost half my weight, I’d be severely underweight. I’m trying to lose weight, jut not that much,lol


What is your most essential kitchen tool?  (Can be a person you know.  For the non-cooks in the crowd).

Courtesy of Roger Shipp

https://rogershipp.wordpress.com/2019/09/15/essential-kitchen-tools/


Gratitude Question:

Who is one blogger you really admire and why?

The blogger who I admire most is *drum roll please* BereavedSingleDad

Bereaved Single Dad has to be one of the most positive people I’ve “seen”, when with the things that have happened would break a normal person. I admire them because despite everything you just get the feeling that the ones he loves are never a burden to him. The places himself and his family have seen. His son is a very lucky person, I know far too many people who would have given up.