Beyond the Veil

I don’t know how many of you do, but I love to meditate. Apparently, I have been doing it my whole life as well. My gran always said that when I just don’t want to be around anymore, she can tell when I’ve taken myself out…I go “beyond the veil”, as it were.

It’s a mainly spiritual type saying. It means, not that you can see “ghosts” or spirits necessarily. When you “day dream”, you go somewhere else. You connect with those on the other side. I’ve been doing it since I was a little girl. Any time I felt threatened, didn’t want to be somewhere, my Gran, would watch me and go “She’s not here anymore”.

I find myself more and lately, needing to escape there more. A lot of people say that Halloween is the one night of the year, when we go behind the veil, and connect with passed loved ones.

Now going beyond the veil, doesn’t always mean that you’d prefer to be dead. I just find I hate it here more and more. But too me, I am not suicidal. I feel it does those who passed over, a disservice, if I was to cross over. So never fear! I just REALLY don’t like the real world that much at the moment…But who does,lol

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International Day of Peace

God knows we need this more this year, than any since I’ve been alive!

I don’t even honestly know how to start with this one, or where to take it. The world, every country, it just does not feel peaceful. I doubt that anyone of *that* side, are going to give us a day of peace either.

If it makes any of you feel better, it is also Batman Day!


Thank you…For calling me a horrible person…

You know I’ve been thinking a lot, dangerous, I know…Hahahaha!

I just wanted to write a public thank you to letter to some ex-friends of mine.

Without them doing, doing what they did. I don’t think I would have ever found the voice I am gaining right now. Before I stopped being friends with them “officially”, I was trying to figure out I could get out of a group that I realised hadn’t grown up since high school, and was…probably still is…Extremely toxic.

I didn’t actually end the friendship myself, they did that. I wrote a note the year I had a really big panic attack, on New Years. Saying what I had been through, where I was. How I needed to get out, how I didn’t want to be left behind anymore. Then a couple of days after that I actually checked my Facebook, “Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh, the accusations!” How it was me who had been treating people horribly, they didn’t like the way I had treated them…And the block…Because of my course my ONLY question would have been “WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?”.

Since then, the ONLY regret I’ve had in life was not letting go earlier on. Sitting there knowing full well what one particular girl was trying to do. Regretting, not ending the friendships when I actually wanted too.

Now, when the fight that happened, happened. I didn’t immediately want to end the friendships then. It was about a year later, when I realised, everything that they accused of being the “problem”. They didn’t actually want to try and fix those problems. When the fight first happened, it made me go…

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Wow, how had I not seen this toxicity, until now?

Since that regretful time, I have found that I don’t like wasting time not telling people anymore where I stand with them.

Colouring-In Book Day!

Oh my god is there anything more self soothing than a colouring-in book? Especially when you get all the colours the right way that you want…exactly!

I think I have about 10 colouring-in books all together. I’m not 100% sure, because I have some at my house and I have some at my partners house. All different. I have an Anne Stokes ones, which actually annoys me the most. The book doesn’t lie flat. The one that I love is my dreaming/animal one. I still have one that I bought in America, over 10 years ago. I haven’t used it since I broke up with my partner from then. Mainly because it was a fairy based one, and of course I made all the Fairy Kings, him,lol.

Night Night, Sleep Tight

Do you have a bedtime routine, or do you just fall into bed? Lately I had been noticing, due to having no work, I was developing extremely bad bed time habits. I couldn’t help it though! For some reason, free to air tv here has started to have these really amazing crime shows in the middle of the night.

Ever since Covid19 hit, I feel like we’ve all changed in some way. Whether it is bad time habits or how we see the world. I am more aware of my surroundings. But the bed time thing always pretty much stayed the same, but even that’s changed. Because it’s not, is it? If our casuals contracts had been renewed, I would have never been up that late to watch those programs.

So, have you changed your bed time habits? No need to give specifics, but just curious. Now I have potential part-time work, it’s made me want to get back into a good bed time habit, even if I don’t get the job.

National Threatened Species Day (Australia) Plant a tree!

Now generally, this is a day where, in Australia (probably NZ too) we take a look and put a spotlight on threatened species within Australian, and more pacific type countries. Due to popularity, we normally look at animals, maybe insects on this day.

What I would mainly focus onto today is on plants and trees. After watching Gardening Australia yesterday, it was horrifying! Simply for our own greed, how many plants are nearly extinct or have rapidly become extinct.

As an example, there are currently over three trillion trees in the world. HOWEVER! We are currently losing 10 billion trees a year!

So get out there and plant a tree!

Farmers of the Skies the Australian Flying Fox, are now considered threatened and on the brink of endangered. They’re called the farmers of the sky, because they like fruits and flowers, then they fly great distances and you know…

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As they say in the article by Animals Australia Org

entire ecosystems could collapse

The earth, animals, plants and trees. All know how to make the planet work. We could learn something from them!

By the time you read this…

…I will not be dead, just let me start off with that.

However, by the time you read this. I will have done my first ever Zoom job interview and I am actually excited! I’m not sure if it’s because I just haven’t worked for months, or it’s because how great would an interview be to do at your own home!

I am also excited for it, because it’s going to be part-time. Which means, if my current place of work ever decides to take on casuals again. I can still work there. Also though, it’s working for a psychologist for children and teenagers, so kind of what I think I’d be interested in. I always thought that I’d make a terrible psychologist, because I would be the one getting attached. However, being part of that area. How great would that be?

Also part-time means, I can start building up a at-home business. I just feel like, yeah I can do this one!


This year has really made me reflect on stuff…One of the “stuff” being “Why do I love crime shows SO much”. After reading about what Trump had been saying this particular day. I thought to myself “This is why I like crime shows”. I would say that at least 95% of the shows I’ve seen. Always has some kind of justice at the end of the show.

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(I am clearly Hawkgirl in this situation)

And honestly, I think that is what keeps me going. Right now, we aren’t really seeing any justice. Trump seems to be getting away with his stuff, transphobes too…and there are STILL really bad police officers out there. It definitely feels like the bad guys are winning.

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After watching all these crimes shows, it can take years for Justice, but they do get their comeuppance in the end…

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